


Damaged

by kittenofdoomage



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Angst, Drama, F/M, Fluff, NSFW, Polyamory, Romance, Sex, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-01
Updated: 2018-12-09
Packaged: 2019-07-18 16:47:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 33,862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16122683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kittenofdoomage/pseuds/kittenofdoomage
Summary: You move away from San Diego and the life you’d discovered was a lie. In Spell, MT, you hide away, trying to heal yourself. When your California constitution runs foul of the Montana winter, you discover that starting again isn’t as impossible as you thought.





	1. Chapter 1

It was colder than you’d ever experienced. Outside of holidays, that is. Montana was nothing like San Diego. The summer had been warm and long; winter came storming in, wet, windy and now, freezing. Your notebook lay open on a blank page and you pulled the blanket closer around your shoulders as you chewed on your pen and stared out the window.

This was supposed to be therapeutic, but after five months, it was becoming frustrating. Sorting through all your memories and experiences was hard.

You thought everything was perfect with your Alpha. Okay, Andrew worked long hours and drank too much, but he loved you. Or at least, you thought he had. He was a cop, one of the best detectives in San Diego and you’d been attracted immediately when your mom introduced you properly. It was a whirlwind romance; he proposed within six months and you were married within the year.

Within four years, he made detective and along with that came long hours, weekends on cases, and barely seeing each other. Things grew tense and for a few months, you thought he might leave. But he didn’t. Andrew started coming home with flowers, gifts, smiles and was there for every occasion he was required for.

He died three weeks later on a case, shot point blank and pronounced dead on the scene.

You’d broken. Throughout the investigation, the funeral and the days that followed, you stumbled blindly. Your mom hovered, insisting you see a doctor - Omegas left by their Alphas wouldn’t survive without them, withering away from a broken heart.

Instead, you went to counselling sessions, therapy. And as weeks passed, you thought you might be getting somewhere, finally managing to clean out Andrew’s things.

Your husband, your Alpha, your  _ mate _ , had been lying to you. Among his possessions, you found case files, hidden in suitcases and document boxes, all implicating him in bribes, robberies and murders. You felt sick to your stomach and for three days, you sat on the information, trying to figure out what to do.

Eventually, you gave in to your conscience and handed the evidence over to David, Andrew’s former partner. It had hurt you to drag up Andrew’s face all over the news and his reputation through the mud. Sixteen men were arrested as a result of the paperwork you’d found but you were thankful when David said you didn’t need to testify.

Home was no longer home, no longer safe in your head. You packed up and drove, ending up at your cousin’s house in Spell, Montana. Finding an apartment above a quiet bookstore called “J 2 Books” had been pure luck - you didn’t need a job. Andrew’s pension and death benefits would provide enough to pay rent and you had your own savings. Everything went through an agent and within the week, you were unloading the few possessions you kept; stuffed animals with sentimental value, some photos, books, and some clothes. Everything else could be replaced.

You were supposed to work on your book.

Yet, five months in, you were stuck. And it was snowing.

And it was damn cold.

Something thunked and rattled. It started getting colder within minutes. You grabbed your phone, calling the agent, getting only a voicemail. Checking the time, you cursed; it was nearly ten at night. No one would be able to help.

Rushing to your closet, you pulled out your thickest clothes, bundling up while you were still relatively warm. Outside, the snow kept falling and the wind howled.

You barely slept. Unable to keep warm, you ended up watching a movie on Netflix while rocking back and forth on the couch, swaddled in sweaters, sweats, blankets and a quilt. By the time the sun rose, you were sleeping sitting up, Netflix asking if you were still watching.

Someone was knocking at the door downstairs and you turned, slowly getting to your feet. Halfway there, the door opened and you sniffed, exhaling a visible cloud of air. 

Both men that walked in were tall. And more handsome than anyone had any right to be. You frowned, realizing they were the landlords and owner of the bookstore you lived above. In the cold, you couldn’t think of their names.

“Hey,” the taller of the two murmured, his face barely visible with the big thick coat he had on. “Y/N, right?” You managed a nod but you weren’t sure how understandable it was in human burrito form. “I’m Jared,” he offered, “and this is Jensen.” The other man nodded and you looked at him briefly.

Your nose was too cold to smell anything. You knew one of them was an Alpha because the same scent was always there. And they were always together as far as you could hear on the odd occasion there was noise. It was only natural to assume they were together. 

You didn’t judge.

Even if they were handsome.

“The heat went out,” you explained slowly, chattering.

Jared smiled and it looked like sunshine beaming out of his face. Ugh, were you hallucinating? “It’s okay, we were just worried when it was so cold and you didn’t answer.” You shivered again and Jared moved closer, unzipping his thick hooded jacket and shrugging it off, draping it around your shoulders. It didn’t do a lot but the sentiment helped.

His scent was thick on the jacket and you unconsciously inhaled. Was Jared the Alpha? You couldn’t tell.

“We’ve got a guy coming, but with the snow, it’s gonna be a little while,” Jensen explained, grabbing your keys from the table by the door. “There’s a portable heater in the shop.”

Jared met your eyes. “We’ve got hot cocoa and plenty of books?”

You managed a shaky smile, your lips almost blue. “That would be amazing.”

*****

It would be hours before anyone was able to get out to the apartment and you weren’t unhappy about that. Which was surprising when you’d avoided most contact with people since you’d moved to Spell. But Jared and Jensen were probably two of the nicest people you’d ever met.

Even if you still couldn’t figure out which one of them was the Alpha.

Jared had brought in breakfast from the diner across the street and once you could feel your fingers again, you enjoyed the pancakes and bacon. The electric heater was heaven, and since it was snowing so heavily, the store wasn’t getting any business.

“So, you’re a California girl,” Jensen teased, smirking at you with a dollop of syrup lingering on his lip. You smiled back and laughed as you answered.

“Does it show?”

“Only a little,” Jared chuckled. “You’ve been here for about six months, right?”

Shaking your head, you took another bite of bacon, chewing it before you answered. “Five,” you corrected. “I like it. It’s quiet.”

“Gotta say,” Jensen commented, leaning in to you, “you gotta be the best tenant we ever had in there.” He met Jared’s eyes and the larger man held his coffee up, mock toasting the comment.

“Here, here.”

You smiled and pushed a piece of pancake across the plate. “Well, thanks. But why don’t you guys live up there?”

Jensen frowned and his bottom lip stuck out adorably, making you stare at him a little longer than you probably should have. “There’s only one bedroom.” His meaning took a few seconds to filter through your brain and you felt your cheeks heat rapidly. “And not a lot of space for two guys. Let alone two Alphas.”

Your eyes went wide at his words. “Huh? You’re both Alpha?” The two men looked at you in confusion and you realized that you’d assumed incorrectly. Jensen and Jared were not gay. And they were both Alpha. Which didn’t explain why you could only scent one of them.

“Wait,” Jared murmured, narrowing his eyes. “You thought we were gay, right?” Embarrassed, you hung your head, but both men started chuckling. “It’s okay. A lot of people assume that.”

“It’s his hair,” Jensen grumbled, scooping a spoonful of syrup into his mouth - the mere thought of that much sugar made you cringe. “He’s a pretty boy.”

Jared nodded his head sharply, pointing his fork at Jensen. “Damn straight.”

“But Alphas don’t tend to live together,” you said, more to yourself than them, confused at the behavior. You’d known Alphas to be best friends but they tended to drift away. These guys were in their thirties and they lived alone? Together? 

“Jared and I both carry the pack gene. We’ve been friends for about -” Jensen hissed, trying to calculate and Jared sipped his coffee loudly. “Gotta be comin’ up fifteen years?”

Tilting his head, Jared smiled. “I know, right?” he joked, addressing you. “I must be a saint.” Jensen kicked him under the table and you laughed under your breath. It was almost relieving they weren’t gay, although you’d never heard of a pack gene. 

“I must have led a sheltered life,” you murmured. “I don’t know what a pack gene is.” You avoided their eyes, pushing the food around your plate a little more as it steadily grew colder. “My family were very traditional. When I presented, marriage was already arranged. Andrew was,” you sighed and shook your head, “the love of my life.” A small pause and you kept your eyes on your food. “I thought.”

There was a few moments of silence before Jared reached over and took your hand. “Sounds like you’ve been through a lot,” he said quietly, his soft eyes focusing on yours as you looked up. “But don’t feel like you owe us any explanation for not knowing about something that’s damn rare anyway.”

Jensen swallowed his mouthful of pancake, grinning widely. “Packs carry familiar scents. Alphas can live in harmony with each other. Like a family unit.”

“It’s not common,” Jared reaffirmed. “It’s an old genetic mutation from early man.”

“And he,” Jensen pointed at Jared, “can’t call me a caveman if he’s got the same damn thing.” He nodded and smiled victoriously as Jared rolled his eyes.

“And you don’t have an Omega?” you asked, puzzled that two men like this were single. They shared a look and Jensen cleared his throat. Jared laughed nervously.

“No.  _ We _ don’t.” He stood up, preventing you from puzzling over that comment and the emphasis on “we”. “Anyway, I’ve got some accounts to do. I’m sure Jensen will keep you entertained.”

You smiled sweetly at him as Jared took your breakfast things. “Thank you. This is really sweet of both of you.” Jensen blew you a kiss and you felt your cheeks heat up. “So what do you do around here all day? You don’t seem to be really busy.”

Jensen shrugged, leaning over the counter to grab his laptop. “Most of our sales are online. Jared likes having the store because he thinks it’ll keep us from going insane.” He opened the computer and tapped on a few keys. “Jared sells rare books. Some of them go for millions.”

“Wow,” you whispered, looking at one book that was more money that you could imagine having. “Good business, huh?”

“Eh,” Jensen murmured, tapping onto another page. “It’s boring, really. But we just,” he sighed, “we love it here. The people, the community. No one cares what you are here, everyone accepts you.” You nodded, your eyes drifting to the large windows at the front of the store.

It was one of the things that had drawn you to the little town of Spell. Quiet, charming; the people were friendly and no one asked questions. “I like it here too,” you admitted quietly and Jensen smiled at you, his eyes almost sparkling in the beige lights hanging above. His shoulder bumped yours and you looked at him a little shyly.

“You shouldn’t lock yourself away up there though,” he commented quietly. “We’d always enjoy the company. Jared especially.”

“Me especially what?” Jared asked, making both of you jump. Jensen cursed and you clutched your chest, your suddenly racing heart making you a little dizzy.

“I was just saying to Y/N here that she should come down and spend more time with us. You said you’re working on a novel, right?” You nodded as Jensen pointed at you. “Well, we got plenty of books. What sort of book is it you’re writing?”

You froze at the question, scrambling for an answer. “R-romance,” you murmured, embarrassed. Neither Alpha seemed to pick up on it, both of them grinning. Jared was nodding, looking around the shop. 

“All the hot cocoa and dirty books you can read?” Jensen tempted, wiggling his eyebrows in a way that made your shoulders relax and the tension thickening in your chest melt away. You giggled and slapped his shoulder.

“It’s not a dirty book,” you defended.

Jensen was still grinning lewdly and didn’t stop until Jared poked him hard. “Behave,” the taller Alpha ordered and Jensen promptly flipped him off. “He’s not wrong though,” Jared added, touching your shoulder softly. “You’re welcome here. Anytime.”


	2. Chapter 2

The day flew by without you realizing. Between in depth conversations with Jared about some of his older books and talking to Jensen about Texas, where he’d been born, you didn’t notice it was dark outside until Jared announced he was locking up.

“Doesn’t look like the guy turned up for the heating,” you murmured, cuddling your blankets around you.

“Hey,” Jensen said, “you are more than welcome to stay at our place until it’s back on.”

You hesitated, looking between them. The warm of the electric heater behind you was bliss and the thought of leaving it made you feel a bit sick. Upstairs was freezing and although you’d spent the entire day alone with them, you didn’t know these men, these Alphas.

Jared noticed your reluctance to accept and stepped forward, gesturing to the heater. “You can take the heater, if you want. Jensen will bring it up for you and plug it in.”

“Yeah,” you nodded, smiling gratefully. “Thank you.” Jensen ducked his head sheepishly and went for the heater.

Once they were certain you weren’t going to freeze to death, they left in their huge truck, easily cutting through the snow. You watched out of the window until the tail lights were no longer visible.

You took your medication and settled into bed, closing your eyes. The heater buzzed happily away in the corner and you fell asleep easily for the first time months.

*****

From then on, you spent most days in the store with Jensen and Jared. They turned up with takeout, obviously hovering to make sure you were eating right, but it was nice. Comforting. Alphas weren’t painted like this to you as a kid growing up in the city. They were working men, rough round the edges, prone to outbursts of temper.

But then, you’d always been told that Omegas would die of a broken heart if their Alphas left in any way. So maybe not everything you’d been taught was true.

Otherwise, you wouldn’t be sitting there six months after leaving San Diego, sharing pancakes on a February morning, with two ridiculously handsome, funny, and intelligent Alphas.

Neither of them asked questions. Just like everyone else in town, if they weren’t told, they didn’t ask and it helped you to relax around them. Jared, in particular, became emotional support on the days when getting out of bed wasn’t an option.

You blamed the phone call for the worst day so far. February had ended on a high note, until you checked your email and March brought guilt and remembrance of why you’d left San Diego. An email from David asking for you to call him, as he didn’t have your number.

Andrew’s former partner.

There were the usual pleasantries; you asked how his wife and kids were, he asked how you were holding up and how therapy was going. The weather was good in San Diego and you coped fine with the snow, thanks.

You were about to say goodbye when David sighed heavily. “ _ You’re still not gonna tell me where you are, huh _ ?”

Smiling, you shook your head, even though he couldn’t see you. “No. Because I know Jane will be turning up here with casserole. I’m doing okay and when I’m ready, I’ll tell you.”

David accepted it, like the last time you spoke and the time before that. He never fought you on it and you were happy to remain unfound for the time being.

The nightmares came swiftly during the night and you barely slept. When the next morning rolled around, Jared was knocking on the door downstairs, three times, like agreed. You didn’t want to move, feeling an exhaustion that seemed to weigh you down onto the bed.

Jared entered when you didn’t answer, using his spare key. He searched the apartment before finding you in bed, back to the door, staring out the window where the Montana sky was just gloomy grey clouds. “Looks like rain,” he murmured, slowly approaching. “Probably one of those days where you don’t wanna do anything.”

He understood better than anyone could, you supposed. The confession that he, this overgrown beast of an Alpha, suffered from the same demons you did, was comforting in an odd kind of way. It made you feel less alone.

“I got you breakfast,” Jared prompted and you felt the bed dip behind you. He wasn’t going to let you wallow, but he wasn’t going to just snap you out of it either.

You could smell bacon. Egg. And…

“Is that… Misha’s hot chocolate?” you whispered, slowly turning in your blankets to look up at him with tired eyes. Jared was smiling cheek to cheek, his dimples on display for the whole world to see.

Misha’s was the only coffee shop in town and the guy who made the hot chocolates was a pure artist. He wouldn’t tell anyone the recipe and you swore you’d never have hot chocolate anywhere else again. When Jared made it, it was cocoa, so it was different.

“It is,” Jared confirmed, offering up the sweet, warm treat. The aroma wafted towards you and you inhaled. “I guess I must have known something was off when you texted me last night. So I got your favorites in case you needed cheering up.”

A small gesture that was wholly appreciated. “Thank you,” you murmured, sitting up with the blankets still around you. “You really didn’t have to.”

Jared gave you a look and remained seated as you clutched at the hot chocolate and breathed in the sweet smell. “You mind if I stay for a few?” he asked and you shook your head, sipping the drink even though you knew it would too warm.

Damn your impatience.

You hissed when you burned yourself, pouting that you were denied the hot chocolate for a few more moments. “Jared?” you asked and he sat up straight. Sometimes he really did resemble a giant golden retriever, which made what you were about to ask him even worse. “Could you pass me the packet on the dresser there?”

He turned and reached up to grab the packet, handing it to you without looking at them. While he watched, you popped out two of the tablets and held them in your hand. “I was on Prozac,” Jared muttered quietly, meeting your eyes. “For a while. Therapy helped me.”

With a nod, you offered him a smile before placing your hot chocolate on the nightstand and picking up your water. “That helps too.”

You took your tablets and swapped out the water for the hot chocolate again. “You know, if you wanna stay up here today, I happen to know Jensen’s got the entire extended trilogy of Lord Of The Rings on his laptop. We could shut the shop, it’s Tuesday so it’s always dead, and get some snacks.” Jared trailed off, like something had suddenly occurred to him and he smiled apologetically. “I’m sorry. It’s not my place to say what you should do with your day and you might wanna be alone. But on the off-chance you don’t, we’re here. So you’re not,” he looked a little sheepish, “alone.”

“Jared,” you started, smiling fondly. “I would absolutely love to stay in bed and watch Lord Of The Rings with you and Jensen.” A grin split his face and you looked down at your breakfast, still in the bag. “I know I haven’t been very forthcoming about… anything,” you continued, reaching out to take Jared’s significantly warmer hand in yours.

“Jeez, your hands are frozen,” he gasped, covering the one that wasn’t holding the hot chocolate with both of his meaty paws. The movement jarred your arm forward, hitching your sleeve up and you snatched your hand back, frightened that he might have seen the thin slivers of scar tissue that riddled the skin. “You okay?” Jared asked, frowning at your reaction.

“I’m fine,” you whispered, “just cold.” Putting on a shiver, you tucked yourself back into your blanket. “You don’t have to spend the day with me, honestly.”

Jared shook his head, sighing. “You’re stubborn, I’ll give you that.” Those multitudinous eyes were on you and your breath stuck in your throat. “Y/N, we want to be here. Me and Jen - we like having you around.” You weren’t sure what to say but Jared continued anyway. “I’ve… I’ve found your scent calming. Like I’m less on edge when you’re near me.”

The confession was quiet and you reached out, letting him take your hand this time. Jared smiled, keeping his eyes on your face. “I feel better when you’re around too,” you admitted.

“It’s freezing in here,” Jared muttered, feeling how cold your hands were again. “I thought the guy fixed it.”

You nodded, shivering and sipping at your hot chocolate. Nope. Still too hot. “I was trying to save energy. Bill was a little high last month.”

It was clear he wanted to say something and if he so much as thought of offering to pay the bill, you’d probably tell him off. Jared cleared his throat. “Have you, er, had enough time to figure out if we’re serial killers or not?” he asked and you giggled.

“What?”

“Well, I mean, Jensen invited you to stay that first day and it’s been a couple of months…” He shrugged, looking like a bashful kid asking his date to prom. “There’s a storm front coming in from the north. Might be more snow. Maybe you should come and stay with us for a few days?”

“What about the store?” you asked, frowning. “I don’t wanna stay in your house all day while you’re at work. I’d feel weird.”

Jared smiled, acknowledging that it wasn’t an outright no. “We’re taking a long weekend. There’s no tourists in town, we haven’t sold anything in store in days and online sales take care of themselves. Mostly.” His hand squeezed yours a little. “I’ll make Jensen cook his famous macaroni and cheese?”

You rolled your eyes and nodded, like that was final dealbreaker. In truth, you were curious about what kind of house these two strange Alphas lived in. “Okay. I’ll hide from the storm at your house.”

“Great,” Jared smiled. “Now, eat, pack and hopefully we’ll beat the rain.”


	3. Chapter 3

Their house was unlike what you’d expected. Two men living together conjured images of food and dirty dishes, things growing in the refrigerator and laundry piled everywhere. 

It was a two-story house on the outskirts of town, framed in a beautiful view of the mountains. Inside was spacious but not to the point it was ridiculous and the decor was tasteful. “This is the lounge and kitchen,” Jensen led you through the open plan area, “and down there is Jared’s room, my room, and the guest room.”

“You never got a third roommate?” you asked and Jared chuckled.

“Other people can find us a little… weird to live with,” he admitted, slapping Jensen on the back as his best friend shielded his mouth with one hand and pointed at Jared with the other. You giggled, hearing a sound from behind you. “Oh,” Jared exclaimed, smiling happily, “we do have additional roomies that will sleep on your bed on occasion.”

Jensen moved past you, heading for the back door. Opening it, two happy looking retrievers bounded into the room, almost skidding on the laminate flooring in their excitement to sniff the newcomer. You were under attack from wet noses and soggy tongues, both dogs vying for your attention.

“The girl with the red collar is Margo. The boy with the green collar is Boba.”

You looked up at Jensen as he spoke, while Boba attempted to bury his nose in your crotch. Jared winced. “Boba Fett?”

“You got it,” Jensen clicked, winking at you. “Anyway, these doggos probably need to go out in the yard. C’mon, guys!” He clapped his hands and both dogs sprang to him, following at his heels as he walked towards the back door.

Jared gestured to the corridor with the bedrooms. “I’ll show you your room for the night. I hope it’s comfortable.” You didn’t say anything, smiling at him and following slowly. The whole house smelled like Jared and Jensen; comforting, warm - alarming. You’d been a widow less than a year. Was this betraying the man who had already betrayed you in life?

The guest room was larger than your own bedroom and the bed looked good enough to sink right into. You stepped inside before Jared, looking around at the neutral decor.

It smelled like them in there too.

“Everything okay?” Jared asked, nervously, as if you thought his home was anything except beautiful.

“It’s lovely,” you replied, turning to face him. “Thank you. This is really kind of you.”

Jared cupped your face, leaning in and for a second, you thought he might kiss you, but Jensen appeared in the doorway, giving Jared a stern look. “Hey, so are we gonna get this movie marathon underway?”

“Sure!” you chirped. “Lemme just ditch my bag and put my stuff in the bathroom.”

“Oh, er, we have two,” Jensen said quickly, jerking his thumb at Jared. “Rapunzel here doesn’t like to share.”

You frowned. “Which one should I use?”

Jared shook his head, holding up a hand. “I don’t mind sharing,” he assured you. “Jensen has different habits than me. It was easier to have a place with two.” You nodded, plucking your wash bag from your duffel bag. Something glinting in the side pocket made you frown and you reached in.

“What’s that?” Jensen asked, pointing at the small stuffed bear that came free. Its eye had been catching the light on the ceiling fan.

“I don’t know. Probably something someone gave to me ages ago and I didn’t throw it away.” You shrugged and stuffed the bear back into the bag. “It’s just a bear. I probably have a ridiculous amount of stuffed toys for an adult. Andrew always said I was childish.”

With a frown on his face, Jared reached out, touching your shoulder. “You’re not childish.” He motioned to Jensen. “Not compared to him.”

The tension broke with his joke and you followed both men from the room, teddy forgotten.

“Movie’s ready,” Jensen announced, waiting for you and Jared to situate yourselves on the couch before turning the television on. It was a huge screen and Jared noticed you looking at the size of it.

“I know, right?” he chuckled, pointing at Jensen as his friend changed the channel. “It’s like he compensating for something.” You giggled at his remark and Jensen stood straight, threatening Jared with the remote control.

“Well, I had to have  _ something _ bigger than you,” he growled but you only laughed harder. Striding over to the couch, Jensen took the seat the other side of you, sandwiching you between their larger bodies. For a second it was a little overwhelming until you forced yourself to relax and focus on the films.

Frodo was volunteering to take the One Ring to Mordor when Jensen stretched, yawned and smoothly slid his arm around your shoulders. For a second, you held your giggles but too soon, it became too much. “That was so smooth,” Jared snorted and you burst out laughing.

“Like you can do better,” Jensen retorted and Jared shrugged. A few minutes later, Jared’s hand slid under yours, lacing your fingers together. You shot him a smile and Jensen pulled a face. “Is that it?”

“Better than yours,” Jared snapped.

“Boys, boys,” you murmured, a little high off the scent of them and the way they were playfully arguing. “How about I show you  _ my _ really lame move.” You stood up, looking at them, debating who to pick. When your attention fell on Jared, he poked his tongue out at Jensen.

“I bet it’s really lame,” Jensen growled.

Moving to the bigger Alpha, you leaned over, sliding yourself across his lap. Whatever boldness was controlling you, you let it happen, settling with your thighs either side of Jared’s and pressing into him. “I’m cold,” you whispered.

Both Alphas were staring with their mouths open. “Hot damn,” Jensen murmured, adjusting himself in his pants. Jared gaped at you, unsure what to do and you giggled. 

“You’re sweating,” he murmured, frowning suddenly. “You okay?”

You looked down at yourself as if that might provide an answer; the only thing you felt was incredibly aroused. Jared’s hand slid around the back of your neck, tugging you closer and you thought he was going to kiss you. Instead, he tucked his face into the crook of your neck, closing his eyes as his nose pressed into the spot below your ear.

“You’re going into heat,” he murmured and you shivered, hearing a faint growl from Jensen’s end of the couch.

Your hair fell out of place when you shook your head to deny Jared’s words, pulling away to look him in the eyes. “I’m not due for another few weeks… the suppressants -”

“Won’t work if you’re around a compatible mate,” Jensen muttered, lifting his eyes to you. “How long have you been on them?”

With a shrug, you pulled back from Jared even more, trying to ignore the insistent press of your crotch against his erection and the pounding arousal making your heart race. “Since I presented. Andrew didn’t want…” You shook your head again. “It doesn’t matter. The suppressants worked around him. We were married, we were… I was…”

Sympathy broke out over Jared’s expression as your distress escalated. “Hey, hey,” he soothed, cupping your cheeks. You fought the tears, overwhelmed by the unraveling of more truths in your past. Jared pulled you close, letting you seek comfort in his hold.

Jensen sighed, scrubbing a hand over his face before getting to his feet. “This was a stupid idea,” he growled.

“Shut up,” Jared warned, casting a vicious look his friend’s way. “Now’s not the time.”

“Clearly,” Jensen replied, stalking off to the kitchen with hunched shoulders.

“Time for what?” you asked, cheek pressed tight against Jared’s chest. He grunted and shook his head.

“It’s not important,” he dismissed and you let it go, suddenly too tired to fight. “You wanna watch the rest of the movie?” With a nod, you slid from Jared’s lap, tucking yourself back into his side. His nostrils flared as you slipped further down, pillowing your head on his lap.

Jensen returned to the room with a second bag of chips and a fresh round of beers. He placed everything on the coffee table and lifted your legs, slotting himself underneath them. You smiled but didn’t look at him, keeping your eyes on the television.

It was easier not to think. Jared’s big hand was on your shoulder, covering most of your bicep, his thumb running back and forth over the joint of your arm. Jensen had his hand on your ankle, mimicking Jared’s movement with his thumb, dragging it underneath the hem of your pant leg.

Frodo got stabbed by the troll and Jensen’s hand moved a little further up. There was a burst of tingling between your thighs and you swallowed the need to hum contentedly. You shouldn’t be in heat. Because if you were and the suppressants were no longer working and it was for the reason Jensen said -

Then Andrew was never your Alpha. 

There wasn’t an Omega alive who hadn’t read the fairytales. Scents that are almost intoxicating, a draw to one person like no other - the signs of your soulmate. Alpha and Omega, the perfect match.

But how did that work when there were  _ two _ of them?

Jensen was mouthing along with the words, whispering when Gandalf uttered his iconic “you shall not pass”. As he concentrated on that, his fingers stopped moving and you felt like someone had opened a window. “Sorry,” he murmured, resuming his movements as he caught your eye with a smile.

With your head in Jared’s lap, you could distinguish his scent from Jensen’s a little better. He smelled warm, just like Jensen did, but with more of a soft underlying sandalwood. Jensen’s scent was sweeter, muskier than Jared’s. Sighing softly, you let your eyes shut as Jared’s scent calmed your racing heart.

The rest of the film played out but you were only half-focused on it. Jared had moved his hand down your arm, until it rested on your waist, fingertips splayed across your belly. Jensen’s hand was inside your pant leg, stroking that really sensitive part on the back of your calf that made your toes curl.

“Two Towers?” Jared asked suddenly and you frowned looking up at him blankly. “The next film,” he explained.

“Oh,” you muttered, remembering with an embarrassed shrug. “For a second, I thought it was a funny nickname for you two.”

Jensen snorted, shaking his head as you sat up to let Jared put the next disc in. “Wouldn’t call it a tower,” he joked and you giggled, glad they weren’t about to mock you for being so out of it. “Hey, pass my beer, wouldja?”

You reached over, eyes on Jared’s butt as he bent over to change the films. God, his ass was perfect. Your fingers brushed the neck of the beer bottle you were aiming for and you just about caught it before it spilled, sheepishly handing it to Jensen.

“Hope you look at my ass like that,” he teased, taking the beer with a wink.

Jared finished his task and returned to the couch, letting you lay back down on him. “Are you comfortable like that?” he asked and you nodded. “Always thought my thighs were a little boney.”

“No,” you breathed. “Very comfy.”

His hand was back on your waist by the time the first few minutes of Frodo and Sam’s journey lapsed and Jensen’s hand was still under the fabric of your pants. Your heart was beating so hard, you were sure the vibration of it must have alerted them to your state but they remained quiet, watching the film. Control over your arousal was long since gone and you realized that Jared was right.

Your heat was starting.

“You’re shaking,” Jensen muttered, looking down at you, dragging his hand out from underneath your pant leg. A protest left your lips in a moan and that caught Jared’s attention. “Y/N?”

“I should go home,” you gasped, sitting up and dragging yourself from the couch.

“You can’t,” Jared denied, following you. You were unsteady on your feet, practically dripping with want. “Shit, you’re… has it happened like this before?” With a shake of your head, you let Jared catch you, clutching his shirt tightly. “Jen,” he barked as the older man drew closer, “go and run her a bath.”

“You got it,” Jensen replied, darting off.

Jared swept you off of your feet in his ridiculously muscled arms, shushing you when you wiggled in his arms. “Y/N, you’re in heat.”

“I shouldn’t be,” you whined pitifully.

“Doesn’t change the fact that you are,” he growled back. His tone was firm and carried a commanding force that turned your bones to jelly.

Jensen was already filling the bath up when Jared walked in with you held securely in his arms. He set you down on the toilet seat, sharing a look with Jensen before checking the temperature of the water. “You’re such a mother hen,” Jensen scolded, kneeling down in front of you. “Hey, sweetheart,” he whispered, brushing your hair away from your sweaty forehead. “Not how we thought this would go.”

“Is it really a good idea for me to stay?” you asked quietly. Your initial attempt to leave had been replaced by a deep-seated fear of rejection. Everything was a mess of confused hormones and you weren’t sure you’d be able to cope on your own. “Jensen, I was married. I was… I had an Alpha.”

“You had an Alpha,” he agreed, taking hold of your hands. “But you didn’t have  _ your _ Alpha.”

Your eyes went from him to Jared and back again. “There’s two of you,” you pointed out. “Omegas don’t have two Alphas.”

“They do if they’re a pack,” Jensen soothed. His thumbs were stroking your knuckles; a simple gesture that was causing a tornado of arousal in your belly that made your entire body shudder with need. You could scent it now and there was no doubt that both Alphas in the room could scent it too.

Jensen touched your face, cradling it with one hand and you leaned into it, closing your eyes.

“Nothing’s gonna happen that you don’t want,” he assured you. “But we’re yours, Y/N.” Your eyes snapped open, focusing on his. Jensen was smiling softly and you searched his gaze; for what, you weren’t sure. “When did you last have a heat? Without the suppressants?”

Your eyebrows furrowed together at the question. “When… when Andrew marked me.” Unconsciously, your fingers brushed your throat where the silver scar was still visible. He’d only done it once. Your answer was met with a dark look. “What?”

“How long were you together?” Jared asked, turning the taps off.

“Five years,” you whispered, not following their train of thought. Another look bounced between them and you grew frustrated. “I don’t understand. What would Andrew marking me have to do with anything?”

“You haven’t had a proper heat in nearly six years?” Jensen’s question was enough to make you pull away from him, looking at them both in turn.

“Why are you asking so many questions?” There were tears in your eyes now, a desperate need to know what the hell was happening making your anxiety worse. “Please, tell me what’s going on!”

Jensen placed his hands on your knees and Jared leaned against the bathtub, watching you closely as he started to talk. “Jensen and I never found an Omega that matched us both. Until you.” He paused, watching your reaction for a second but you only looked at him curiously. “But you had an Alpha. You were marked. Or we thought you were.”

You jumped when Jensen’s fingers trailed over your old mark. “Did he make you take the suppressants?” he asked softly.

“I - Andrew didn’t want children yet. He was a detective. We - we were waiting.” You couldn’t hold Jensen’s gaze, dropping your eyes to the floor. “He was killed on a case.” Neither Alpha spoke and you took a deep shuddering breath. “I found out he was… he was working for a criminal gang.”

“Are you in witness protection?” Jared enquired and you shook your head.

“No, I moved here to get some space. San Diego was crowded and -” He nodded, not needing you to continue. You’d already shared your previous mental health issues with Jared, as he’d shared his with you. “Are you sure I should be here if I’m in heat?” It was an obvious attempt to change the subject but it wasn’t going to work.

“We’re Alphas, not animals,” Jensen murmured, standing up and moving to the door. “The bath will make you feel better. It’s almost dinner time.” He gave you a small smile. “I’ll go make something. You need to eat.” He left and Jared smiled, taking his place.

“I said he’d cook,” he joked and you giggled, despite your inner turmoil. “I’ll give you some privacy, okay?”

Your hand snagged his wrist as he started to get up. “No, wait,” you started, making Jared pause and bend over, his face level with yours. His lips were centimeters away and you lost all train of thought, only able to focus on his mouth, the image of kissing him making your belly twist.

“You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to,” Jared reaffirmed.

“Stay,” you said, the suddenness of the word shocking you. Jared frowned a little before tugging you to your feet. You were unsteady, swaying a little and his hands held your shoulders so you didn’t fall.

“Maybe I should,” he muttered, lifting one hand to test your temperature. Standing had made you dizzy and Jared’s proximity, his mouth-watering scent, was giving you a one track mind. He said something else that you didn’t catch and then he was tugging your shirt up over your head.

The material was dropping to the floor when you remembered the damage to your right forearm. Too late, you rushed to cover it but Jared had already seen. One huge hand wrapped around your right wrist, lifting it as you trembled.

How disgusted would he be? To see the physical evidence of your weakness?

Jared didn’t say a word. He ran his thumb over the thick jagged scar tissue for a few seconds, then released your arm. His eyes met yours and he cupped your cheek, leaning in to kiss you softly. “You won,” he murmured. There was confusion for a second and he smiled when he realized you weren’t getting it. “You’re standing here with a scar, but you won. Because you’re here.”

Your breath caught in your throat and you covered his hand with your own, meeting him this time when he moved in closer. Jared hummed against your lips as you kissed, letting your body mold to his perfectly. When you broke apart, you could feel the outline of his cock pressing into your belly. “Jared -”

“We need to get your temperature down,” he interrupted with a smile. “C’mon.”

The initial panic about being naked in front of him was dispelled by his completely gentleman-like behavior. He insisted you keep your panties on, although you opted to remove your bra because you’d been wet with a bra on before and it wasn’t comfortable.

Jared didn’t even sneak a quick glance, closing his eyes and hold his arm out to help you into the large tub, waiting until you said you were covered by the suds. Jensen knocked a few seconds later, popping his head around the door. “Hey, I paused the movie. In case you wanna go back to it.”

“That’s cool,” Jared replied, “thanks, man.”

“Everything okay?” Jensen asked, noting that you were in the bath and Jared was still in there. You nodded, sinking further down into the tepid water. “Jare?” 

“We’re good,” Jared murmured, meeting his counterpart’s eyes and nodding. Jensen seemed satisfied with that and turned away, returning to whatever he was doing in the kitchen. You watched as Jared stared at the door for a few moments before his head swiveled back to you. “You okay?”

You nodded, picking up a handful of bubbles, watching them sparkle in the overhead lights. “It feels odd. I guess because it’s been so long since I had one.” Your voice was quiet and Jared didn’t respond, letting you have the space to talk. “My mom insisted on suppressants when I presented. We were a nice, middle-class family and she was always worried about me ending up with some Alpha who wasn’t,” you sighed, shaking your head. “She talked about finding an Alpha that was right for me, but it was never about me. It was always about her reputation.”

“I’m sorry,” Jared murmured but you waved his concern off, flicking bubbles everywhere accidentally.

“I kinda accepted it. Mom had already arranged for me to marry an Alpha from a family we knew. Andrew was… he was a few years older and he was a cop. We went to junior high together for a little while. He didn’t seem like he’d be interested in me at all. But he was so nice to me. He genuinely seemed to care about me and when he proposed, I said yes.”

“Why did he only mark you once?” The question was one you’d never been sure of the answer to. When you were a girl in school, Omega romance stories were long and involved epics where they were knotted and marked over and over. As an adult, you saw these stories for what they were: teaching Omegas to be the submissive possessions of their Alpha masters.

You’d never once considered yourself inferior because of your genetics, but looking back on your relationship with Andrew, things were seeming less clear cut.

“On our wedding night,” you replied. “Traditional. Afterwards -” You paused, shrugging and wiggling your toes in the water, watching them break the surface into ripples. “I wasn’t having heats so he didn’t need to, he said. The doctor said it was fine so I didn’t think anything of it.”

“Wait, if you weren’t having heats -” Jared’s question ended dead and you frowned up at him. His cheeks were red and you weren’t sure if it was just the effect of your pheromones. He cleared his throat and tried again. “If you weren’t having heats and he wasn’t marking you -” He failed again, giving you a helpless look. “I’m trying not to be rude and invasive right now,” he mumbled.

You smiled affectionately, placing your hand on the side of the tub. “I get it. Sex, right?” Jared nodded and his hair fell in his face. With a sigh, you leaned back, closing your eyes. “It was okay, I guess. Andrew was the only person I ever had sex with so I don’t really have a standard of measure.”

He sniggered at that and you frowned. “Sorry,” he said, cheeks going even redder. “The phrasing…”

It was to be expected - Jared and Jensen both had very dirty senses of humor and you’d gotten used to it. There wasn’t a day you’d spent with them that you hadn’t heard the phrase “that’s what she said”. The laughter seemed to alleviate the tension of your confessions and your facial expression relaxed.

“We were having trouble,” you admitted, not meeting Jared’s eyes. “He was working a lot, he was mean and I wasn’t coping well with being on my own so much. I didn’t have many friends and I didn’t work because Andrew didn’t feel I needed to.” Jared’s face scrunched up at that but you didn’t notice, too caught in the bubbles sparkling on the surface of the bath. “We had a fight and he didn’t come home that night. I was angry and I thought it was the end and then… he changed. He was spending more time at home, buying me gifts, flowers, taking me out to dinner.” 

Tears were gathering in the corners of your eyes as you remembered the night before he died. “Andrew knotted me twice the whole time we were together. On our wedding night and the night before he died.” You were crying now and Jared was leaning on his forearm on the edge of the tub, clutching your hand. “We were both raised that way - heats and knotting were only for procreation. And Andrew was firm on it - no kids until he made sergeant. But now I think… I think it was just a show. I was just another job to him.”

Jared’s grip on your hand tightened as he shook his head. “No, Y/N. You’re sounding like you think this is your fault.”

“I could have been a better Omega,” you replied, still not looking at him. “I tried. I went to therapy, I took the pills. It was my fault I wasn’t normal.”

“You’re perfectly normal,” Jared insisted, his voice on the edge of a growl. “You have an illness. You can’t change that. Just because you can’t see it doesn’t mean it isn’t as real as something physical.” You were shuddering now, unable to open your eyes and you knew your face was scrunched up.

Ugly crying while mostly naked in a bathtub next to one of the hottest men you’d ever seen. A new low.

The self-revelation only made you cry harder and Jared moved, slipping his arms around you, not caring that his sleeves were getting wet. His hair tickled your shoulder as you sobbed at your own perceived failures.

It took a few minutes for the sobs to ease off and Jared pulled away, sliding his hand from your shoulder to cup your face, wiping away the tears that still clung to your sticky and swollen skin. “Better?” he asked.

“A little,” you admitted, pulling out of his grasp.

Jared sighed. “The water’s getting cold,” he murmured, dragging his finger through the liquid. “I’ll get you a towel.”

Nothing else was said as Jared helped you out of the bath, still behaving like a gentleman. The fluffy towel he gave you was obviously one of his - it was huge and draped around your ankles no matter how much you tugged it up to your chest.

Feeling a lot steadier on your feet, Jared left you to dress and when you emerged into the living room, both men were sitting on the couch in the same positions, waiting for you. Jensen gestured to the coffee table, grinning. “Nachos,” he announced with pride.

Resuming your position between them seemed natural and you curled into Jensen’s side when the food was finished, feeling one of Jared’s huge paws on your hip. His other hand covered your feet and you sighed happily, falling asleep before Helm’s Deep was saved.


	4. Chapter 4

The credits were rolling when you opened your eyes and it was snowing again. Jensen was asleep, sitting upright with his head cradled on top of the cushions, one hand still on your shoulder and the other across the couch. Jared was slumped over behind you, keeping his weight off of your body with his arm, hand propping his head and hair covering his features like a curtain.

When you shifted to relieve the ache in your hips, Jared woke up, lifting his head slowly and meeting your eyes with a sleepy smile.

“What’s the time?” he asked, yawning as he sat up. You didn’t have answer, so Jared leaned over and tapped the remote for the tv. “Oh, it’s only nine.”

Margo whined from where she was by the back door, rousing Jensen, who automatically slipped away from the couch and slouched toward the door to let the pup out. She darted out into the snow and Jensen shut the door again, knowing she’d bark when she wanted back in.

“Hey,” he greeted, dropping himself back down onto the cushions and giving you a dopey smile. “Did the film finish?”

“Little bit,” you replied, stretching upright with your arms in the air. Your stomach rumbled loudly and you covered it with your hands, embarrassed by the sound. “Guess I’m still hungry.”

“Well, we’re not getting a pizza in this weather,” Jared muttered, gesturing to the snowy yard beyond the huge French windows. Margo appeared, chasing snowflakes as Boba lay on the floor indoors, watching her with sad eyes. “Grilled cheese?”

You pulled a face, casting your eyes over the remains of the nachos and cheese from the earlier meal. “I think I’m cheesed out.”

Jensen chuckled, reaching out to take your hand. “Don’t swear.” He kissed your knuckles and got up, not noticing the way your eyes followed him, your lips slightly parted. “I’ll find something to eat in the kitchen. Good thing I’m a genius.”

Jared rolled his eyes, tugging you back into his side. “He likes to think that,” he murmured, his lips pressing against the shell of your ear and you hummed, closing your eyes and sinking against him. “You okay?” he asked, noticing your dreamy expression.

“I don’t remember it feeling like this,” you whispered, arching into Jared’s hand when he checked your temperature again. “I need…” God, you were practically writhing against him now and Jared growled a warning, pinning you against his side firmly.

“I know what you need.” His hand pressing between your thighs, and you instinctively opened them to him. Jared was breathing heavily, warm air coasting over your neck where he was resting his head. You moaned when he kissed along your throat, stroking you through your pants.

It seemed like Jared knew exactly what he was doing; the aching in your core was increasing with every stroke of his thick index finger.

“You know, it took us a few days,” he muttered, the low timbre of his voice making you shudder, “to figure out that the Omega who’d rented the apartment was ours. The scent of you - it took everything we had not to knock on the door.” You gasped and arched against him and Jared chuckled. “I could almost believe it was the universe that tripped the heat that night, brought you to us.”

His finger moved faster and you cried out, hips shaking against him. Jared growled against your ear, dragging his teeth over your throat.

Relief was instant when you came, panting for breath in Jared’s arms. The tightness in your belly dissipated and you slumped back with your head in his lap, eyes closed as he kissed your temple and smiled.

“Did that help?” You nodded, feeling more than a little boneless. Under your head, Jared’s cock twitched in his pants and your eyes shot open. “Sorry,” he murmured, leaning down and kissing you hard, curving himself in a way that probably shouldn’t have been achievable with his huge frame.

“You’re bendy,” you giggled when he pulled away and Jared laughed as you turned, moving your head further back on his lap so you could rest your hand on the bulge in his pants. His laughter quickly dissolved into a groan when you squeezed him.

Through his pants, his cock felt huge and you realized that Andrew had been setting a very low standard of measure.

“You gotta stop that,” Jared crooned breathlessly, taking hold of your hand. “Because if you don’t, I’m gonna fuck you.”

Your heart was racing. “I don’t see a problem with that.” It was your hormones talking, it must be, because you never spoke to anyone like that. Maybe you were possessed by some sex-starved demon.

“I do,” he replied. “For one, you gotta eat.”

“And?” you purred, lacing your fingers through his, staring at his huge hand enveloping yours.

“Jensen,” Jared growled, capturing your lips in another bone-melting kiss. The couch dipped and you felt hands on your legs.

“Startin’ without me again?” Jensen rumbled, sliding his fingers up to your thighs. “You need to eat first,” he commented and Jared grinned as he lifted his head.

“I already told her that.”

You scowled up at him, pouting childishly. “I’m not a baby,” you scolded. “Just because I haven’t had a heat in years doesn’t mean I’m going to suddenly stop functioning.”

Jared had the good grace to look sheepish and Jensen sat up straight, laughing under his breath. You pulled yourself up, climbing off of the couch and stepping over Jared’s long legs.

Turning back, you raised an eyebrow in their direction. “Come on. If I gotta eat, then you gotta eat.”

*****

You were sure they’d had some sort of silent conversation over your head while you were eating. Jensen and Jared had a very unique way of communicating without saying a word and it was as intriguing as it was damn frustrating.

“So, romance novel,” Jensen started, leaning over the kitchen counter as Jared took your empty plate and loaded it into the dishwasher. “Not dirty. What’s the plot?” Margo and Boba were by his feet, chasing their dinner bowls across the floor as they ate.

A nervous laughter escaped you and you wiggled on the bench, feeling the heat prickling your skin. “It’s not as much of a romance as I made out,” you admitted, becoming preoccupied with your thumbnails. “Mostly it’s part of my therapy. I just happen to enjoy writing and my therapist suggested that I try and achieve a dream while I was healing.”

Jared shut the dishwasher and turned it on, moving to stand next to you. “So you’re going to sell it?”

“Eventually,” you sighed, letting your shoulders drop. “I don’t know.”

“We gonna go and watch Return Of The King?” Jensen asked, shoving his hands in his pockets and Jared opened his mouth to speak, stopping as you stood up abruptly, taking Jared’s hand. The early orgasm had given you a brief respite but you could feel the need in your belly growing, gnawing at your insides.

It was a hunger you’d never felt before.

“You okay?” Jared asked when you squeezed his fingers tightly. He caught your scent a second later - you saw it the exact moment his pupils dilated and his nose twitched. Jensen growled low in his throat when it reached him. “Heat?”

You nodded, licking your lips as you looked from him to Jensen. It was conflicting, the emotions you felt. You’d never thought that this could possibly happen and the guilt wasn’t as harsh as you’d thought it could be. Was there any reason to deny yourself this obvious connection?

“Hey,” Jared soothed, sliding one arm around your waist, pulling you close. “Why don’t we go to Jensen’s room and put the movie on?” he suggested, looking up at Jensen, who nodded and darted off ahead. You let Jared tug you away from the counter towards the hallway.

“You keep saying -” You stalled, holding back a bit and Jared walked in front of you, turning to look at you as you tried to get the words straight in your head. “You keep saying nothing will happen if I don’t want it to.” He nodded, waiting. “But what if… what if I want it all? I want you. I want Jensen.” Was it guilt blocking your throat or the simple inability to say the things you meant in the correct way? Either way, you swallowed it down, forcing yourself to continue as your watery eyes locked with Jared’s. “I don’t know if I’m supposed to feel bad for it.”

Jared smiled, pushing your hair out of your eyes and behind your ear. You wondered how much of a mess you looked right now - you felt like the hottest of messes to ever exist. “It’s natural to feel that way. You’ve been through a lot.”

“Is this natural?” you whispered. “Is it natural to want someone this much? I’ve never felt like this before.”

His hand took yours, pulling you close and into a deep kiss. It lasted only a few seconds and you were breathless when he broke away. “Does it feel right?” Jared asked and you exhaled a breath that made you shudder.

“Yes,” you replied quietly, letting him pull you towards Jensen’s room.

The bed was huge, taking up most of the room, plenty of space for all three of you, including Jared’s ridiculously long legs. Jensen was already setting up his tv, flicking through the channels to find the right one. You climbed onto the bed, taking the middle spot and Jared slotted himself in on your left hand side. Jensen pressed play and took the right side, stripping off his overshirt so he was wearing only his t-shirt.

“I always thought the beginning of this one was boring,” you commented, curling towards Jared. Jensen rolled over, deciding to play big spoon and you smiled when his hand splayed over your hip. “I prefer the end of the movie to the start.”

“The big action scene?” Jared asked and you nodded.

“That’s my favorite part,” Jensen muttered, his voice suddenly close to your ear. His lips brushed your earlobe and you squirmed, pressing your ass back into his crotch. He was already hard.

A wicked idea sprung to life in your head and you laid your arm across Jared’s chest, purposefully scraping your thumb over his nipple. It instantly hardened and Jared’s jaw tightened, his eyes no longer focused as he stared at the tv.

“I don’t wanna get bored and fall asleep before the good bit,” you murmured seductively, repeating the drag of your thumb over the thin material of Jared’s shirt. Jensen’s hand tightened on your hip, rutting against you without bothering to hide it.

Jared dropped his gaze to you and you moved your hand without breaking eye contact, sliding it down over his firm stomach to the waistband of his pants. He didn’t flinch when you tucked your hand beneath the material of his shirt, wiggling your fingers into his jeans slowly.

Your fingers brushed the swollen head of his cock and Jared groaned, lips parting slightly as he closed his eyes. Jensen was unbuttoning your pants now, pushing them down over your hips. Unable to get your hand any further inside Jared’s tight pants, you started to unbuckle his belt. He moved, capturing your lips with his before you could shriek in surprise, his hands taking over where yours had started.

Jensen had your pants all the way off now and you kicked them away from your feet, torn between what he was doing and what Jared was doing. The larger Alpha was stripping his pants and boxers blindly as he kissed you and you whined into his mouth when you finally wrapped your fingers around his thick bare cock.

“Now do you see why I had to get a big tv?” Jensen mumbled and you grinned at the joke as Jared pulled you into another kiss.

For a long moment there was nothing but your breathing and the background noise of the movie. All you could focus on was the feel of Jared between your fingers… thick, warm, pulsing heat that seemed to echo in your belly. Jensen was half-naked now, pushing your shirt up over your bare breasts so he could kiss as much skin as possible. His cock was pressing against the back of your thigh and you couldn’t help but grind onto it wantonly.

You stroked Jared’s cock when he started to kiss you again, thrusting his tongue against yours and tasting the inside of your mouth. One of Jensen’s hands slipped around underneath your thigh, lifting your leg and draping it across his own. “Is this okay?” he asked in a whisper and you nodded, breaking away from Jared’s mouth to look down as Jensen cupped your sex, dragging his teeth over your pulse point.

Jared groaned when you started to stroke him harder, both of you watching when Jensen pressed two fingers against your entrance, easing them into you and making you whine at the sudden fullness. His fingers felt huge and thick, curling up to seek out your sweet spot.

They’d barely started and you felt like you were coming apart at the seams. Jared kissed you until all coherent thought was washed away and Jensen started to fuck you with his fingers, slowly opening you up, his other hand underneath you, groping your breast.

“I can smell how wet you are,” Jared growled, covering your other breast with his hand, rolling the hardened peak between his fingers. “You want Jensen’s knot, Y/N?” Gasping, you nodded, pushing down onto Jensen’s fingers now, greedy for more. “Keep touching me, baby,” Jared urged. “He’ll go slow.”

“Don’t…” you whispered, shaking your head a little, trying to catch your breath. “Don’t want slow,” you whimpered, curling your fingers in Jared’s hair and tugging him closer so you could initiate the kiss for a change. Maybe it was the sudden rush of hormones in your blood but you felt desperate for them. “Want Jensen inside me.”

Jared grinned, his top lip curling up into a playful snarl as Jensen chuckled against your neck. “She’s bossy,” he drawled, withdrawing his fingers from your body. “You want my cock, darlin’?” You nodded, biting your bottom lip.

A second later, the velvety head of Jensen’s cock was pressing against your cunt and you groaned, arching and trying to sink down onto him. Your body was shuddering and your hand had come to a complete stop on Jared’s shaft, although he didn’t seem inclined to remind you of what you were doing.

“Patience,” Jensen muttered, rubbing the tip of his dick through your folds, coating himself in your slick. “We’re not goin’ anywhere.” He lined himself up, easing the first inch into you and you shivered, gasping a cry that Jared quickly kissed away.

Jensen stopped, reacting to your body’s natural resistance, waiting for you to relax. You were clenched tight around him and he moaned, stroking your clit with one finger.

“Gotta relax for me,” he whispered, rubbing the sensitive bundle of nerves until your body reacted and his cock slipped into you a little more. You cried out, breaking away from Jared and the bigger Alpha moved out of your reach until his head was level with your breasts.

His mouth closed around your nipple, sucking it between his lips and your noises only got louder. The combination of Jensen’s cock, his fingers on your clit, and Jared’s mouth on your tits was more pleasurable than you’d ever dreamed of. Your filthiest dreams hadn’t been like this.

You felt so very vanilla.

Jensen’s hips were flush with yours now, his cock buried inside your body to the hilt. He groaned, relinquishing his touch on your clit, using his hand to hold your leg up. Jared instantly took over, his calloused fingertips stroking your clit, millimetres from where Jensen’s shaft stretched you open.

“Take this off,” Jensen growled, tugging at your long sleeved sweater and you nodded automatically, letting him drag it over your head before you remembered that Jensen hadn’t seen the scars. Jared pulled away from your nipple as Jensen undressed you, taking the opportunity to shed his own shirt.

Neither of them said anything. Jensen’s hand glided right over the ugly raised skin, bypassing it without so much as a flinch, letting his fingers resume holding your leg up. Jared was between your legs now, pressing his tongue to your clit as Jensen started to move.

Was this what sex was supposed to be like? This pushing, pulling, grinding heat that spiralled outwards from your belly and made you feel like you were going to simultaneously implode, melt and die but in a really fucking good way? Was it supposed to be slick and messy, where you could hear just how hard Jensen’s cock was sliding into your wet channel, and feel Jared’s tongue torturing your clit?

The younger Alpha’s words came back to you. Does it feel right?

It felt more right than anything you’d ever experienced.

And you couldn’t comprehend what that meant right at that moment.

Jared’s teeth grazed over your clit and you shuddered, tightening reflexively around Jensen’s cock and the older Alpha snarled, picking up his pace. “Wanna feel you cum,” Jensen encouraged, his voice rough and primitive, and you tasted blood as you tried to temper your cries by biting on your lip.

It didn’t work. Your body felt like it was full of light for a second and something snapped in your core, forcing your hips to jerk and shudder as your insides squeezed around Jensen’s shaft. He grunted, digging his fingers into your hip as his knot started to thicken.

Giving your clit one last lick, Jared broke away, crawling back up to kiss you. You could taste yourself on his lips and you moaned into his mouth, blindly groping for his cock. He chuckled at your enthusiasm, continuing to kiss you as you found your prize and wrapped your fingers around it. “My turn next,” Jared growled, cupping your face and forcing you to look at him. “Can you feel Jensen’s knot, ‘mega? Feel him ready to fuck you full?”

You nodded desperately, gasping for breath as Jensen’s cock slammed into you repeatedly. Sweat was making your skin slick and your entire body ached.

One hard thrust and Jensen’s knot was inside you, swollen enough to lock your bodies together and he snarled loudly, pressing his forehead against the back of your neck as he pumped thick ropes of cum into you. Your nose was squished against Jared’s, your mouths almost touching as you whined through the last of your climax.

Jensen went limp, releasing your leg, although you didn’t move it. A wave of calm went through you and you shuddered, sighing against Jared’s lips. “You okay?” he asked and you nodded, smiling.

“You’re not,” you replied, squeezing your hand around his cock.

“I’m good for now,” Jared insisted, kissing you again. Your body clenched again and Jensen grunted at the sensitivity his cock was now exhibiting. He was panting against your back, hot breath on already sweaty skin and you shivered. “Cold?”

“No,” you whispered, trying not to move as Jensen slipped his arm around your waist. “You… Jensen -”

“Mm-hmm?” Jensen mumbled and you smiled.

“You didn’t mark me.”

Jensen lifted his head, meeting Jared’s eyes. “We hadn’t talked about it. Not gonna mark you if it’s not what you want.”

You frowned, wishing you could see his face, looking at Jared in confusion. “I don’t understand.”

Jared’s big hand was cupping your cheek again, his stunning eyes looking right into yours. “We’re not marking you until you’re sure. This… for us? Is everything. But you’re in control.” His thumb stroked underneath your eye and you realized you were still holding his cock, stroking it almost rhythmically, making the tick in his jaw more prominent.

“I’m moving,” Jensen warned, kissing the back of your neck softly and pulling away with a grimace. His cock slipped free and you whined at the movement. Before you could roll onto your back, Jared lifted you, guiding you to straddle his lap. The other Alpha propped his head up on the pillows, watching you and ignoring the movie.

Jared grasped the root of his cock with one hand, lining himself up with your slick hole, not caring that Jensen’s cum was easing his path. You threw your head back when he started to enter you; his cock was thicker that Jensen’s, a little more curved and definitely longer. But Jared didn’t rush. He took his time, letting you have the control over your movements and just holding himself steady.

Rollings your hips, you attempted to take more of him, whining when you only managed another inch. Using the same trick Jensen did, Jared placed his other hand on your belly, dragging his thumb down to stroke your clit. “That’s it,” Jared grunted, watching his cock slowly penetrate you. “God, you’re so fucking tight, even after Jensen.”

Jensen was still watching, one hand lazily stroking his stirring cock. You were panting heavily now, desperate to have Jared buried inside you. His thumb worked faster and you cried out, flexing around him, the slick of your pussy letting the last few inches of his shaft sink into you.

It felt like he was in your belly. You went still, feeling the scratch of his pubic hair against your labia as you sat impaled on his thick length. Jared was breathing just as heavily as you were, hands on your thighs, shaking with the effort of holding still. He tipped his head back and sucked in a breath; his cock twitched and you whined at the sensation.

“You know, I always wondered what it looked like,” Jensen drawled, still touching himself, “to see someone take that thing.” Jared laughed, the vibrations almost making you go cross-eyed. “Actually might be the hottest thing I’ve ever seen.”

You tried to smile but the feeling of Jared so deep inside was too much and you felt like the second you moved, you’d cum. Or pee. The pressure was almost identical.

Jared didn’t seem to be in a rush, letting you take your time. When you lifted up the slightest amount, he hissed and his eyes rolled back. “Holy shit,” he ground out, “I don’t… god, you feel amazing.” Jensen hummed in agreement.

“Jared,” you mewled, almost falling over him. “It’s too big, I can’t…” You panted and he caught you in a kiss, forcing you to lift even more. Jared raised his hips, pushing back into you and you squeaked against his mouth. “Oh…”

He repeated the action and you sucked in a breath, curling your nails against his chest. If it was this uncomfortable being on top, he’d kill you if he fucked you from behind. Sounded like a pretty nice way to go.

The thought made you giggle spontaneously and Jared paused, looking at you with a puzzled expression. “Sorry,” you muttered, still giggling. “I just had a funny thought that your dick might kill me because it’s too big.” One eyebrow rose up but Jared didn’t say anything. “Inappropriate timing,” you mumbled and he grinned, jerking his hips up.

His cockhead pushed against your cervix and you cried out, imagining him fucking right through into your womb, filling you with cum until your belly swelled with it. The dirty thought made you clench and get wetter, and Jared growled with pleasure.

“Do you want me to fuck you?” he asked and you nodded listlessly. Jared moved, using one arm to push himself up and the other to safely roll you onto your back. From this angle, his cock didn’t feel quite so big and you moaned, clenching around him. His hips moved.

The whole of his length was inside you again and it felt just as big as it had before.

“You want this?” Jared asked, giving shallow little thrusts that teased of the power he had. “Want me to knot you?”

You nodded again, “Yes, please, Jared, want it.”

Jensen growled, shifting on the bed as Jared pushed up on his arms, looking down at you. You moved your head, reaching for the other Alpha, taking his renewed erection in your hand.

The world tilted on its axis when Jared started to withdraw, thrusting all the way back in and repeating the earlier feeling that he was going to break you. It was every point on the spectrum from pleasure to pain but you were drowning in ecstasy. Jensen moved closer and you parted your lips to lick at the tip of his cock, moaning along with him as Jared fucked into you.

You wanted this. You wanted both of them. Forever.

“Mark me,” you gasped, stroking Jensen’s cock as you took a moment to breathe. Jared’s head jerked up and his pace slowed, his eyes locking with the other Alpha.

“S’not just me,” Jared panted in reply, not breaking eye contact with Jensen. His friend’s eyes were indiscernible; Jared couldn’t read his feelings for a change. “It’s both of us, Y/N.”

“I want both,” you replied, almost crying in desperation. “You’re my pack.”

The admission made Jared groan and he leaned in, kissing you hard before lifting himself again, a renewed vigor behind his thrusts. Now your body had adjusted, the pleasure of his thick girth was overwhelming and you cried out when you felt your climax brewing in your core.

Jensen pulled away, stretching out so he could kiss you and fondle your breasts. “You too,” you whispered, touching his face with your fingertips. “Want your mark too, Jen.” He nodded and kissed you, and Jared snarled, his knot thickening inside you. You broke the kiss with Jensen and arched, crying out.

Jared’s knot was thicker than Jensen’s and it was more than you thought you could bear when he forced it inside you, locking you together as he emptied himself into you, his teeth sinking into your throat right over your old scar.

When he was done, he remained there, using his tongue to clean the wound and you closed your eyes, wondering if you should feel anything except the sublime content rushing through your veins.

For a moment everything was still and quiet, except for Gimli asking Aragorn where he was going. Jensen quoted Legolas’ line and you giggled, breaking the tension.

Jared lifted up, sparkling eyes meeting yours for a brief second before he kissed you and you could taste your blood on his lips.

You woke up the next morning between the two of them in the dark bedroom, smiling happily at them both. Twin marks, one either side of your throat, would heal quickly; for now, they throbbed lightly, but not painfully, just making you aware of them.

The past felt like it was finally leaving you. Settling back down into your pillow, you closed your eyes. Jared and Jensen moved at the same time, cushioning you protectively.

It was easy to fall asleep again.


	5. Chapter 5

The snow passed within a day and by Monday, the roads were clear. Jared insisted he wanted to check the shop and get some more groceries and Jensen reluctantly dragged himself out of bed. You’d already dressed by the time he emerged, snagging your sweater to pull you in for a kiss.

“Jensen!” you squealed, pushing him off. “Morning breath. Gross.”

He flashed you a grin and headed for the kitchen. Jared had already made a fresh pot of coffee and he eyed Jensen dubiously as the older Alpha poured a cup.

“Are you gonna get dressed or are you intending on showing Mrs. McLaren your crown jewels?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at Jensen’s state of undress. He had on his bed robe, but he was clearly nude underneath. You giggled as Jensen rolled his eyes and walked off with his coffee. “Five minutes!” Jared yelled.

Jensen flipped him off without looking.

“You’re so bossy,” you commented and Jared’s eyes landed on you.

“I’m bossy?” he replied, stalking towards you and you darted away, Margo on your toes like you were playing a game with her. “You’re the bossy little Omega,” Jared growled playfully and you ran, heading for the bedrooms. Jensen looked up as you tumbled in with the dog following and Jared closely behind. Boba ambled up slowly in the rear, wondering what all the noise was about.

“Stop!” you shrieked as Jared tackled you onto the bed and Margo barked, jumping up and down. Boba fixed sad eyes on Jensen, who shrugged at him.

“I’ve got no idea,” he said and Boba promptly laid down in the doorway.

Jared was tickling you now and you couldn’t stop laughing, trying and failing to protect your sides. “I give, I give, Jared -” You squealed when he didn’t relent. “I’m gonna pee!” That stopped him and he looked up at you with a sappy grin, moving in to kiss you. It didn’t last long - you were already struggling to breathe.

“And I’m the one that takes forever?” Jensen groaned, pulling on his pants. “C’mon. I’m buying breakfast at Misha’s.”

Not long after, bundled up in one of Jensen’s old coats, you crossed the street in between the two Alphas, feeling a spring in your step that hadn’t ever really existed before. You thought you’d been happy.

You’d thought wrong.

Hot chocolate and croissants on a cold Monday morning was exactly what you’d needed and you spent a good hour trading jokes with Jensen and letting Jared feed you marshmallows. It was like one of those dreams moments that didn’t quite seem real.

The shop was freezing when you walked in, opting to keep your coat on. Jensen and Jared had a few things to take care of and you needed fresh clothing, so you left them downstairs and ran up to the apartment. There was some mail on the floor and you scooped it up, leaving it on the table and heading for the bedroom.

You went through your clothes, picking out your more comfortable items. The living situation hadn’t been discussed yet, but they had already told you that it was Game Of Thrones night and you were watching with them and not alone in the apartment.

They’d think up another excuse for you to stay tomorrow too, you suspected. And hoped.

Bending down to look under the bed for your slippers, you frowned when they weren’t where you left them. Kneeling on the carpet, you looked around, searching them out and spotting them at the bottom of the bed. Picking them up, your frown deepened.

Maybe you’d moved them when you left. You hadn’t been having a brilliant morning.

Shrugging, you slipped them into your duffel and lifted it onto your shoulder, heading back down the steps and grabbing your mail, leafing through it.

“Junk,” you muttered, “junk, junk. What was I expecting?” You sighed, tossing the last leaflet which left a single white envelope in your hand. It was addressed to you but had no postage or stamp, which usually meant someone had delivered it by hand.

A knock on the door made you jump and you stuffed the envelope into your duffel bag, opening the door to Jensen. “Hey, we’re gonna head out to get some groceries. You comin’?”

With a nod, you followed him out of the door, closing and locking it behind you.

*****

The grocery store was pretty dead and you stood in the candy aisle, debating between Snickers and M&M’s. Jared appeared behind you, smiling brightly when you looked up and saw him. “Hey,” he murmured, slipping his arms around your waist, pressing his face into the side of your neck. “Struggling to pick?”

“Yeah,” you sighed, eyes drifting back to the sweets. Another shopper stopped at the end of the aisle and you giggled when Jared dragged his teeth over his mark on your throat. “Stop that,” you scolded.

“Why don’t you just get both?” he asked and you shook your head.

The other shopper moved on, face concealed by a baseball cap, but you could see the sneer of disgust on the man’s face, even with his thick beard. Pulling yourself out of Jared’s arms, you placed a hand on his chest.

“No. Because the outcome of that is that I’ll eat it all and hate myself when I look in a mirror or Jensen will eat it and spend hours complaining of toothache.” You inhaled and Jared’s expression was soft, full of amusement. “What?”

“I think I…”

Jensen walked around the corner, talking to someone on his phone and Jared looked up with a frown. “Yeah, mom, I know I didn’t visit for Christmas. And I’m sorry I can’t make it for Dad’s retirement party. I’ve just got… things…” He rolled his eyes and Jared looked sympathetic.

“His mom?” you asked, feeling a little bit state-the-obvious. Jared nodded.

“He avoids going home a lot,” Jared murmured, keeping his voice out of Jensen’s range. The other man was still listening to his mother and judging by his face, it was a lecture or something equally irritating. “His mom is lovely but Jensen’s brother and sister both have kids. They don’t understand that Jensen can’t just shack up with any Omega that comes along.”

You didn’t reply, watching Jensen’s expression change as his mother spoke to him. His chin dipped lower and lower into his chest and his shoulders slumped.

Abandoning Jared’s side, you went to Jensen, sliding your arms around his waist and slotting yourself so your head was underneath his chin. He took a deep breath, wrapping his free arm around your shoulders. “Yeah, I got it, mom. Look, I gotta go, I’m busy.”

Jared reached over and threw the Snickers, M&M’s and a big bag of assorted candies into the basket, following as Jensen started to walk, his arm holding you against his side.

“Sorry,” he murmured and you frowned at him. “My mom doesn’t understand. For a long time, she thought me and Jare were just hiding something. Ever since, there’s been a lot of tension.” Jensen’s eyes were watery when he glanced at you. “Very Christian family,” he added.

“You don’t need to apologize,” you whispered. “I get it when families are difficult.”

“Do you still talk to your mom?” he asked and you shook your head, looking away from him. Jared was almost caught up now. “Do you miss her?”

“I know it’s probably horrible to say I don’t, but I don’t,” you said softly. “My mom wasn’t nuturing or kind; she was ignorant at best and abusive at worst. Most of the time I had a nanny because she didn’t wanna dirty herself with the hands on stuff.”

Jensen scowled at that, his jaw clenching. “She sounds like a prize.”

You coughed a laugh at that, smiling. “Oh, yeah. I was her Best In Show when I was little. Perfect little princess.” The cashier was smiling as you approached but it was one of those horrible fake smiles, usually reserved for customer service or for judging someone. Jensen kissed your temple as he broke away from you to dig his wallet out of his pants and you caught the second of failure on the girl’s expression.

A little bit of evil burrowed into your chest. Most of the people in the little town were pleasant and friendly. You didn’t use this grocery store often and hadn’t met the girl but the way she was looking at you in disdain, the disapproval clear in her eyes: how did you get a man like Jensen?

Jared handed the basket over to Jensen who started to pile his items on the belt. The cashier greeted him, leaning over a little to showcase her cleavage.

You wanted to claw her eyes out.

“Hey,” Jared murmured softly, noticing the sudden tension in you. “What’s wrong?”

Shaking yourself, you flashed him a smile. “Nothing,” you replied, “I’m just being an idiot.” Jared looked up to where the cashier was flirting with a completely oblivious Jensen and understanding dawned on his face. You looked away, embarrassed at your childish behavior.

“You jealous?” Jared asked, pressing up close behind you. “Watch them,” he ordered and you dragged your eyes back to the cashier. “I’ve spent a long time with Jensen. He wouldn’t notice flirting if someone held a flashing neon sign in front of him.” The cashier girl laughed and flicked her hair back, sticking her tits out a little bit more. Jensen noticed the price on something was wrong and the girl turned to use the microphone to call for assistance, not shy in slowly dragging her hand along the length of the metal pole.

Jensen remained oblivious, smiling happily.

Jared’s hand was on your waist, his mouth close to your ear. “And even if he wasn’t, do you know what he’s thinking about?” You shook your head, mouth suddenly dry. “He’s thinking about the way you looked this morning, sucking his cock as I fucked you from behind. He’s thinking about the little noises you make when he cums down your throat and makes you gag.”

You whimpered, trying to stifle the noise. The little old lady in the next queue gave you a disapproving look and another employee arrived with the correct code for the item Jensen had queried. The cashier girl purposely touched his hand when he went to pay and Jared chuckled in your ear.

“He wouldn’t touch her,” he continued, his thumb rubbing circles on your hip, “because she’s nothing to him. Doesn’t matter how pretty you think she is, or how pretty she thinks she is, she couldn’t be as beautiful as you are to us.”

Little old lady sent a death glare as you sagged against Jared’s broad chest and he started to laugh at your disheveled state.

“I didn’t even touch you,” he pointed out, slinging his arm around your shoulder as Jensen picked up the bag of groceries. You followed Jensen out, pushing down the petty feeling that you were glad the pretty girl had seen you with both of them. “Goddamn, it’s hot as fuck when you get jealous.”

“Who’s jealous?” Jensen piped up, slowing his pace to match yours and Jared’s.

“Y/N,” Jared replied.

You gaped at him. “I was not!” you hissed. “I didn’t even say anything.”

“You didn’t need to,” Jared chuckled as Jensen grinned. “You looked like you wanted to claw her face off.” You fell silent, climbing into the back of the car as both Alphas kept laughing at your indignation. It was raining outside now, making the remaining snow and ice treacherous. “Be careful, Jen,” Jared warned, buckling up in the front seat. “Roads are gonna be real bad near the house.”


	6. Chapter 6

“You are all caught up right?” Jensen asked, looking up from where he was chopping vegetables. You frowned before realizing he meant Games Of Thrones and answered with a nod. “Awesome. We always watch on a Monday and we’re just starting the last season.”

You stole a piece of carrot, munching on it thoughtfully. “Why not watch it every night?”

“Monday is usually the only night we’re not both busy,” Jensen explained as Jared walked in, Margo and Boba hot on his tail. “How’s your sister?” Jensen asked Jared and the taller man grinned, nodding.

“She’s good, man,” he replied, heading for the oven to check on the chicken. “She just finished her new book.”

You looked up, raising an eyebrow. “You didn’t tell me your sister writes.”

“They’re kids books,” Jared chuckled. “I think I’ve got her first one upstairs somewhere.” The second floor of their house was a study that Jared used more than Jensen and housed gym equipment that they shared. “Hey, how’re the vegetables coming Jen?”

Jensen grunted, scraping the chopped veggies into the saucepan and passing it to Jared. You watched, leaning against the counter as they moved around each other like they were almost dancing, completely in tune with one another.

Honestly, you could forgive yourself and anyone else for thinking they were gay. You’d never seen two men, let alone two Alphas, so comfortable around each other.

Your thoughts were interrupted by a shiver and you realized your toes were cold. “I’m just gonna go get my slippers,” you said, sliding across the linoleum floor toward the duffel you’d unceremoniously dumped by the couch.

The white envelope was still on top.

Pulling your slippers on, you padded back into the kitchen, holding the envelope in your hands. “What’s that?” Jared asked, frowning at it. Jensen was crouched, pulling the chicken out of the oven to check it.

“It was in with my mail. But no stamp.” You held it up for them to see. “Might be something delivered around town?”

“They don’t usually put names,” Jared murmured, taking it from you. “You wanna open it? It’s probably junk mail.” Shrugging, you tore at the seal, spotted what looked like a photograph inside. Something was familiar about it and you pulled it out, face going slack as you realized what you were looking up.

It was a photo from your wedding day. You and Andrew, stood in front of the San Diego skyline, smiling like you had the world in your hands. Well, you were. Now, seeing his face after so long, you could see the false emotion on his features, like he was acting.

Your hand was shaking. The light made the photo slightly translucent and there was something written on the back. Turning it, you didn’t hear Jared asking if you were okay.

Til death do us part.

The red marker resembled blood and you dropped the photo, stepping backwards. Margo was behind you and you trod on her paw, making her yelp and you shriek in surprise. When you saw you’d hurt her, you burst into tears, dropping to the floor. The old retriever whined, instantly crawling into your lap, forgiving you in a second like dogs usually did.

Jared was crouched beside you and you buried your face in Margo’s neck, your arms around her as she let you seek comfort from her. Boba hovered a few feet away, intrigued by all the noise.

“She okay?” Jensen asked, chicken forgotten on the stove. He reached out and picked up the photograph, staring at it. Jared touched your shoulder, coaxing you to look at him.

“I’m okay,” you whispered. “But that… that photo is from -”

“I saw,” Jared interrupted, rubbing your shoulder. Margo pulled away and trotted off, none the worse for the accident that had befallen her. “We should call the police.”

You shook your head, getting to your feet. “No. No, it’s fine. I’ll call David.” Jensen was still holding the photo and you stared at it like it might suddenly attack. “Could you just put it back in the envelope? I’ll need to mail it to him.”

Jensen nodded and took the photo and envelope away as Jared held your shoulders and looked you in the eye. “Are you okay?” he asked. You nodded, closing your eyes and trying not to think about anything Jared’s scent and that you were safe with them.

Andrew was dead. People didn’t come back from the dead. There was some reasonable explanation for this.

There had to be.

*****

You called David as Jensen and Jared set the table for supper, informing him about the photograph and that it appeared to have been delivered by hand. David was instantly cautious and asked you to mail it to him, like you were expecting him to.

“Who could it be?” you asked nervously and David sighed across the line.

“Honestly, I’ve got no idea. I mean, you handed in the evidence and a lot of people went away but you didn’t testify. There would be no point in threatening you unless you were a witness. That’s why you didn’t bother with witness protection.” He paused. “Could be the press? Trying to draw you out. It was a high profile case.” David groaned and you heard the squeak of his chair in the background. “Goddamn, Jane is gonna have my nuts if I’m not home soon.”

“I’ll let you get home. And I’ll mail the photo and envelope to you first thing tomorrow.”

“Gotcha. Are you somewhere safe?” You glanced up at David’s question, seeing Jensen and Jared arguing over whether the potatoes should go at the head of the table or next to the chicken.

“Yeah,” you murmured, “I’m safe.” David wasn’t aware of the developments in your life; you doubt he cared to hear about it anyway. Wishing him and his family well, you ended the call, approaching the table as Jensen pulled a chair out for you. “Oh, thank you, kind sir,” you curtsied and slipped into your seat.

“You are very welcome, m’lady.” Jensen’s British accent was awful and Jared started to snigger on the other side of the table.

“You sound like Parker,” he commented and Jensen frowned, not getting the reference. Jared held his hands up like he were a puppet on strings. “Tea, m’lady?” he mimicked and Jensen grinned, utilizing the fingers guns to show his understanding.

You smiled like a dope, not talking as they piled up their plates and bickered good naturedly. The photo still lingered in the back of your mind like a dark cloud but you ignored it, deciding that David was probably right. You’d never given a single interview and the case was still talked about in San Diego. It was a reporter, trying to bait you after finding out where you’d gone. Changing your family name and dying your hair didn’t exactly do a lot to hide you.

Once dinner was eaten, you settled in between the two Alphas on the couch, barely paying attention to the show as it started. Jared and Jensen commented all the way through but you were content to just be there. Eventually, you fell asleep, cushioned against Jared’s lap.

Soft voices woke you but not fully. It felt like a cloud of whispers cushioning you as your mind became alert.

“It’s late, man. Y/N’s been asleep for an hour.” Your mind sighed happily at the sound of Jensen’s deeper baritone. Jared replied, his voice sounding closer.

“I’ll carry her in.”

“The guest room?”

“I don’t wanna assume she wants to sleep in with us tonight, Jen. She’s… that photo had her rattled.”

Jensen snorted. “I tell ya what, he was punching above his weight.”

“Jensen,” Jared’s voice had a warning edge and your eyebrow twitched. The whispering clouds were shifting from your limbs, letting you wake slowly.

“Guy didn’t look like he could satisfy his hand,” Jensen continued and you opened your eyes, yawning widely and sitting up. Jensen swallowed, looking a little like a deer in headlights. “Y/N. You’re awake.”

You nodded, stretching your arms upward. “I don’t wanna sleep in the guest room,” you muttered sleepily. “Wanna sleep in with you.” Pausing, you reached out to Jensen, leaning your head against Jared’s shoulder. “Both of you.”

Jared smiled, dropping a kiss to the top of your head. “Jen, I’m gonna let the dogs out.” He got up, leaving you in Jensen’s hold. The slightly smaller Alpha scooped you up, smiling when you clung to his neck and burrowed your head in his shoulder.

“You think he was punchin’, huh?” you mumbled, one eye cracked open and focused on Jensen’s face. He smirked and laughed under his breath, still facing forward as he carried you towards his bedroom. “My mom said I was lucky to land a guy like Andrew when I wasn’t the best looking girl.”

“Your mom sounds like a class A bitch,” Jensen growled. “I hope I never have to meet her.”

“Unlikely,” you replied quietly, closing your eyes. You felt exhausted and knew the cause was most likely the weekend of sex combined with the stress of the photo. “It’s nice you think I’m pretty.”

Jensen didn’t respond, entering the bedroom and laying you down on the huge bed. “I don’t think you’re pretty,” he replied, “I know you’re beautiful. So quit hating on yourself.” He smiled, leaning over to capture your lips in a deep kiss that had you begging for more when he pulled away. “You’re the hotness.”

“More like hot mess,” you muttered, pushing your pants off and scrambling under the covers. Jensen stripped down to his boxers, sliding in the other side, both of you waiting for Jared. You could barely keep your eyes open and Jensen noticed, pulling you into a spooning position.

You were asleep by the time Jared came to bed.


	7. Chapter 7

Waking with a gasp, you sat bolt upright in bed, fully expecting to face Andrew, his face twisted and rotten, gun aimed at your head. But all you saw was the wall-mounted television and Margo sitting at the foot of the bed with her ears perked up.

Jared was snoring softly, his face buried in his arm as he slept and you looked at him fondly before turning to look at Jensen. The warmth next to you was not what you thought - Jensen was gone and a body pillow in his place.

Frowning, you slipped out of bed, finding your slippers and putting them on before leaving the bedroom. There were lights on in the living room and when you walked in, you found Jensen, sat up playing video games with Boba asleep, head on his master’s lap.

“Hey, baby,” Jensen greeted softly, looking up at you with a smile. “Couldn’t sleep?”

“I had a nightmare,” you admitted, walking over and taking the spot next to him. Margo followed, jumping up onto the couch and snuggling down, half on your lap. “It woke me up. I wondered where you were.”

“I get pretty bad insomnia sometimes,” Jensen admitted. “I haven’t slept much the last couple of days.”

“Even with all the exercise?” you quipped, grinning wickedly and Jensen laughed, finishing his level and putting the controller down. “Is something bothering you? I mean, we can talk, if you want. Or you could show me how bad I am at this game?”

Jensen watched you for a moment, something sparkling in his green eyes. “Honestly, it’s just insomnia. I don’t like taking sedatives. I’d tell you if it was anything.” He paused, leaning back and taking your hand. “What was your nightmare about?”

You sighed, looking down at his fingers, lacing yours through them. “Andrew. He was… a zombie. I think. There was a lot of confusing information. But it was scary. He was going to shoot me. Then I woke up.” The look on Jensen’s face wasn’t mocking or condescending, it was understanding and patient. His capacity for empathy was astounding; probably one of the reasons he and Jared worked together so well.

“Can I ask you a question?” Jensen said suddenly and you frowned, nodding. “I saw the scar. On your arm.” You touched your forearm instinctively, fear churning in your belly. “I didn’t want to say anything and I get if you don’t wanna tell me.”

“No, I do.” Rolling your sleeve up, you showed him the long thick scar that ran from your wrist to halfway down your forearm. Jensen reached out, taking your wrist and you inhaled, shuddering as he touched it with his fingertips. “I was seventeen. I’d just presented and my mom pulled me out of school. She was disappointed that I carried the Omega gene, said I had to go on suppressants and birth control. I wasn’t allowed to see my friends and I didn’t have any siblings.”

Jensen’s eyes were on you now, his face illuminated by the flickering game graphics on the television. “She locked you up?”

“Not that drastic,” you muttered, smiling a little. “She was controlling and I wasn’t allowed anywhere on my own. I’d already been struggling with things at school and dad leaving and now I was under constant watch. I was miserable and I didn’t have a way out.” You moved your arm a little, sighing at the memory. “I wasn’t trying to kill myself. I didn’t know what I was doing. I wanted to not be there anymore but I didn’t want to be dead.”

There wasn’t any reply from Jensen; he’d heard it before from Jared and it broke his heart to hear it from someone else. To him, it was another reason to be thankful for you being in their lives. Maybe they could help you heal too.

“All it got me was a week in a psychiatric unit with my mom freaking about how this would reflect on her. I think… when she said she’d arranged for me to meet Andrew, I fell in love with the idea of being free from her.”

“What was he like?” Jensen asked and you smiled.

“He was sweet. Charming, thoughtful… even though the marriage was pre-arranged, I was still excited and he still seemed like the perfect man.” Your shoulders dropped. “All an act, now that I look back. I thought I loved him but now I think it was just accepting a new authority over me. He treated me exactly the same as my mother did.”

Jensen shifted on the couch, pulling you into his side. “It won’t happen here,” he whispered, kissing the top of your head. “We wouldn’t do that. I know you’ve been here a few days and we were kinda expecting you not to leave -” You pulled away, looking up at him as he swallowed the lump in his throat. “But if you wanna go back to the apartment -”

“No!” you cried, startling Boba. The dog climbed off the couch, stretching his back legs out as he went before trotting to the window and slumping down on the floor. You smiled at him, returning your eyes to Jensen. “I don’t wanna go back to the apartment. And not because of the photo.” The dark cloud of dread that you’d ignored returned, taking up residence in the pit of your stomach. “I want to stay here because I feel like I belong here. With you and Jared.”

“You do,” Jensen murmured, cupping your face. “We’re yours, sweetheart.”

You didn’t know what to say in response to that so instead, you kissed him, sliding your tongue against his lips to ask for entrance. Jensen groaned, kissing you back, pushing you back onto the cushions and prompting Margo to move very suddenly.

His hands were everywhere, tugging at your clothes as you fumbled for his pants, both of you lost in the moment. The Xbox controller tumbled off of the couch and onto the floor with a loud clatter but neither of you noticed, drowning in kisses.

Jensen didn’t wait two minutes when he had you bare, pushing his cock inside you to the hilt, groaning when he bottomed out. Claiming your mouth again, he started to rock his hips into you, his hands gripping your ass tightly.

“I’m not gonna last,” he warned and you nodded, unable to control your own raging arousal. Your inner muscles tightened around him and Jensen growled, burying his mouth against your throat, his teeth teasing his mark. “I’m gonna knot you, baby. Need to… need…” He snarled and sank his teeth in, making you cry out and cum hard around his throbbing shaft. His knot pushed inside you, locking you together as he pumped thick ropes of cum into you.

You were panting for breath when he pulled back but it didn’t stop you pulling him in for another kiss. It seemed like forever that you lay there, intertwined together, still half-dressed and indulging in drawn-out kisses. You could taste your blood on his tongue.

Jared was stood by the door and he had been for the last two minutes. You’d scented him and was aware of his presence, just like Jensen was. “Are you coming back to bed?” the younger Alpha asked, smiling at you both softly.

Jensen reached over for the controller, turning the console and television off. “We’ll be right there,” he promised, giving the other man a grin. Jared nodded, turning around and walking back to the bedroom. Dropping one last kiss, chaste in comparison to the other, Jensen eased himself away and you moaned when you felt his cum dripping out of you. “C’mon,” he whispered, tugging you up from the couch, “let’s go to bed.”

*****

On Tuesday, Jensen went into the shop on his own. Jared needed to drive over to Great Falls and asked if you wanted to join him. It was an eight-hour round trip but he promised you that the bagels would be worth it.

He wasn’t lying and the drive was beautiful. The Montana landscape was breathtaking and Jared told you about the things they did in summer. There were some beautiful hikes around Spell and of course, the lake was a perfect summer swimming spot.

It was almost dark when you arrived back at the house and Jensen was home already, beer on the coffee table and one of his games on the television. You walked into a chorus of barking from the dogs and Jared let them out, glaring at Jensen. “You been sat there long?” he asked.

Jensen gave him a defensive look. “I did the dishes and the laundry. Y/N said she was cooking tonight.”

Jared had the grace to look sheepish, kissing the side of your mouth and heading for the kitchen to put the rest of the bagels in the refrigerator. Jensen patted the sofa and you dropped down next to him.

“Someone asked for you in the shop today,” he said, watching your face. You took his controller, restarting the game and promptly dying.

“Was it Mrs. Noon from down the street? She left me a note asking about the community fair next month.”

“No,” Jensen replied. “Never seen her before. She asked for you, said she thought you lived upstairs but she couldn’t get an answer. I told her I’d pass a message on.” You handed Jensen the controller back, frowning at him. “She was about thirty, blond hair, curls. Tall.” He narrowed his eyes as yours widened. “Her name was Olivia.”

You were shaking now, thoughts going back to the photo you’d already mailed to David. “She’s my… she was my sister-in-law,” you whispered. “What did she want?”

Jensen shook his head. “She didn’t say. Gave me her number and asked me to pass it on.”

“She was a cop,” you murmured, not really listening. “She probably managed to track me down. Why would she want to talk to me?”

“I don’t know,” Jensen replied uselessly. “But you don’t have to call her. Not if you don’t want.”

Another, more serious thought was coalescing in your mind. What if Olivia was the one who sent the photograph? She would have access to them - Andrew’s mother loved photos and had several different printouts of your wedding day. She’d always dropped hints about pictures of babies.

It made you wonder if she was in on his lies.

“Olivia might have sent the photo,” you said, locking your eyes on Jensen. “What if she’s threatening me?”

“Then we’ll protect you,” Jared announced, approaching from the kitchen. “Nothing is going to happen to you. I promise.” He walked around the couch, sitting on the other side of you to Jensen. “We’ll call our friend in the local sheriff department. He can look into this Olivia girl.”

“No, it’s okay,” you replied, shaking your head. “I’ll call David. He knows Olivia. They worked in the same precinct.” Taking a deep breath, you tried to calm yourself, not willing to drown yourself in anxiety. For once, your head seemed to listen and you stood up from the couch. “I’m going to cook some supper.”


	8. Chapter 8

A few days of hiding at the house had left you feeling caged. The following Monday saw you packing up your laptop, resolving to return to life as normal, joining Jensen and Jared at the store. It was mostly procrastinating and watching funny cat videos but it was better than feeling like a coward hiding indoors.

David called after lunch and you excused yourself up to the apartment to take the call. “Hey, David,” you greeted, closing the front door and walking up the stairs into your lounge.

“ _ Hey, Y/N, _ ” David replied. “ _ Jane wanted me to let you know she’s got a care package ready to go whenever you want it. _ ”

“I’ll bet,” you giggled. “And you at least know what  _ state _ I’m in now,” you commented. “Speaking of, have you seen Olivia recently?”

“ _ Olivia? _ ” David sounded confused. “ _ Olivia had a nervous breakdown about five months ago. She’s on medical leave until she’s declared fit for work. No one’s seen her since she left. _ ”

“She’s here,” you whispered, fear clutching your heart tightly. “She came into the store and asked Jensen where I was.”

“ _ Wait, who’s Jensen? Isn’t that one of your landlords? _ ”

“Yeah,” you replied, unsure whether to tell him any more than that. “He said Olivia came in last week. The day after I mailed the envelope to you.”

David cleared his throat and you heard him rustling papers around. “ _ About that _ ,” he started and your heart raced wildly, “ _ we got a match for the prints on the envelope but everything else was a dead end. Standard marker pen, no other DNA. The only prints were yours, Jensen’s and Andrew’s. _ ”

You were silent for a moment, knowing it wasn’t you or Jensen and Andrew… Andrew was dead. An image of your nightmare the week before flashed into your mind and you shuddered. “Maybe it was Olivia. She hated me. Told me I’d ruined her family’s reputation. She threatened to shoot me.”

“ _ Olivia was upset and unstable but she’s a good cop. A good person. I don’t think - _ ”

“Well then, who else could it be?” you demanded, almost crying. “David, I’m scared.”

“ _ Then tell me where you are and we’ll come see you. We’ll protect you _ .”

“I’ve got someone here to protect me,” you mumbled. “Two someones.” You sucked in a breath, rushing to speak before David could. “I’ll text you the town. But don’t think you have to come running. I’m safe. I promise.”

“ _ Alright. The second something happens - _ ”

“I will call,” you promised. After saying goodbye, you hung up, sighing and slumping down onto your couch. The apartment was cold, void of life and you decided you’d much rather be downstairs with Jensen and Jared. Grabbing a couple more bits to take with you, you jogged down the steps and out the door.

*****

“It’s getting warmer,” you commented, stepping out of the store and waiting for Jensen to lock up. Jared was at one of his evening classes and you were going to collect him before heading back to the house. “Won’t have to worry about the heating much longer.”

Jensen smiled, slotting the key into place and locking the door. “Were you worrying about it now?” he asked, turning to face you. “I’m not complaining but… you’ve brought most of your clothes to our house.”

You blushed, looking away across the dusk-lit street. The lamps were just coming on and there were still people walking up and down with shopping. “I was under the impression you wanted me to stay,” you replied, meeting his eyes.

“Oh, baby, you can stay forever,” Jensen groaned, pulling you against him and kissing you. His lips were icy and you giggled, pushing him off. “C’mon, let’s go get -”

“Y/N?”

You turned at the sound of your name. Olivia was stood on the sidewalk behind you, staring at you like she’d seen a ghost. “Olivia…” you stuttered, finding Jensen’s hand and squeezing it. He remained silent but strong, standing at your back. “What are you doing here?”

“Didn’t you get my message?” she asked, looking accusingly at Jensen.

“I did,” you replied instantly, not wanting to implicate Jensen. “I just… why do you want to see me? You hate me.”

Olivia’s eyes crinkled at the edge. “No, Y/N, I don’t… look,” she sighed. “I’m in town for a day or two more. And I wanted to talk to you. About what happened.” Her eyes darted to Jensen again.

“We’re going to be late,” he muttered and you swallowed, looking from him to her and knowing he was right.

“Please, Y/N,” Olivia said quietly. “You have my number. I would… just think about it. We could go for coffee. Public place.” She moved to the side. “Please think about it.” You nodded, managing an “ok” before Jensen was guiding you to the truck. Olivia remained outside the shop and you kept your eyes on her as Jensen drove you away.

“She was intense,” Jensen said quietly and you nodded, looking down at your hands. “Are you going to see her?”

“I don’t know,” you admitted, looking out of the window.

The decision didn’t get any easier to make as the evening wore on. You were quiet and withdrawn, both Alphas noticing your mood.

“I think you should go,” Jared announced and you looked up like you’d only just noticed you weren’t alone. “It would be closure. For her too. It’s a public place, so you won’t be in danger.” You mulled it over, jumping a little when Jared took your hand. “We can be at the store. Why don’t you ask her to meet you at Misha’s? Tell her what time, so you’re in control.” 

Jensen was nodding. “Misha’s is just across the street from the shop. You’d only have to text us or tell Misha and we’ll be there.”

You pulled your phone out from your pocket, staring at the number you’d saved under “O”. Tentatively, you texted her, saying you’d meet her at the cafe opposite the bookstore at two pm. A few seconds later, you received a smiley face and three “x” kisses. “Two tomorrow,” you exhaled, meeting their curious eyes. “I hope you guys are sure about this.”

“We’re sure. Nothing’s gonna happen to you, Y/N,” Jared insisted, squeezing your hand when you put it back on the table. Jensen stood up, walking around the table to slide his arms around your waist.

“I think you need to be distracted,” he murmured, running his mouth along the shell of your ear and you shuddered. Jared smirked at Jensen’s ploy and went along with it. “Bedroom?” Jensen asked.

Gasping as his hands cupped and kneaded your breasts, you nodded, letting him pull you from your seat. Jared was quick to follow, both of them manhandling you into the bedroom.

Jensen didn’t seem to mind that his bed had been commandeered as a communal sleeping area. You got the impression that he didn’t like sleeping alone anyway.

Shooing Margo off of the bed, Jared waited for her to exit the room before closing the door. Jensen was already pulling your shirt over your head, kissing every patch of skin he could get at as Jared pressed in from behind, unhooking your bra to free your breasts.

The two Alphas sandwiched you in, bare-chested between them and gasping for breath in between their demanding kisses. They moved you as they saw fit, knowing exactly how to make you whimper and beg with just their fingers and tongues.

Jensen dropped to his knees as Jared turned you to face him, cupping your cheeks to kiss you in a bruising fashion. Fingers snuck underneath the waistband of your pants, then your underwear and Jensen dragged the whole lot down in one go, waiting for you to lift your ankles so he could toss them aside.

His tongue pressed into your pussy and you moaned into Jared’s mouth, clutching his shoulders and pushing your ass back against Jensen’s tongue. He chuckled, pushing your thighs apart before attacking your clit with enough force to make you cry out.

Your hands slid down Jared’s chest, stopping at his jeans, a mischievous idea popping into your head. You pulled at his belt, sliding it free before undoing the buttons on his pants. Jared watched you with dark-lidded eyes, kissing you whenever Jensen’s tongue made you whine needily.

“You wanna suck my cock, pretty Omega?” Jared purred, holding your chin in his fingers as your hands freed his cock from the tight fabric of his boxers. “How good does Jensen’s tongue feel in your pussy?”

“So good,” you whimpered, stroking his cock, unable to move your chin from his hold. Jared smiled and kissed you again before releasing you. Instantly you dropped and Jared’s hand fisted in your ponytail, holding you steady as you kissed and licked his thick shaft.

He moaned sinfully, tipping his head back. You were bent double between them now, Jensen’s tongue buried deep in your cunt as his fingers pinched your clit, and Jared’s cock bulging your cheeks. Your eyes watered when you tried to take more of him in and your gag reflex caught you by surprise. Jared groaned when your throat constricted and your drool made it easier for him to thrust against you.

You pulled back, gasping for breath - okay, you couldn’t get the whole thing in but you weren’t going to give up entirely. Jared watched you, eyes lidded with pleasure as you started to work your lips over his head, dragging your tongue in a point along the vein on the underside of his shaft.

Jensen was fingering you now, his eyes locked on the way you were sucking Jared’s cock. The green in his eyes was darker now, lust making them appear slightly glazed. He pushed two fingers into your clutching channel, scissoring them back and forth.

“You gonna fuck her?” Jared asked, still watching you suck his dick, your fingers rolling his sac and making him grind his teeth. You moaned in agreement, wanting nothing more than to cum around Jensen’s cock; your pussy walls fluttered and Jensen chuckled.

“I think she wants me to,” he growled, grazing his thumb over your clit. “But I wanna feel you cum first, ‘mega.” His breath stroked over your pussy and you whined, pulling off of Jared’s cock and stroking him hard.

“Please,” you managed before Jared was pushing his cock back into your mouth, groaning as you obediently returned to licking and sucking, moaning as Jensen’s hand moved faster.

When you came, your legs shook and you struggled to stay upright. Jensen’s touch abandoned you half-way through and just as you thought you might be done, on the verge of collapsing, he penetrated you with his thick shaft and you screamed.

Jared took the opportunity to coax more of his cock into your mouth and you lost yourself between them, impaled on Jensen as Jared fucked your mouth. Your toes were barely scraping the floor now as they fucked you back and forth, and you were unsure if you’d had several orgasms or one really fucking long one.

Jensen came first, not stopping the harsh slap of his hips as he fucked through his climax. He didn’t knot you and for a second you were relieved, but then Jared was cumming and you struggled to swallow it all, gasping as he pulled back and shot the last few ropes over your face.

Easing you off of his cock, Jensen helped you up, guiding you to the bed. Jared disappeared, returning in only his Saxx briefs with a damp washcloth to help clean you off.

You were half-asleep already when they slid in beside you. Jensen turned the television on, flicking through to find something to watch as Jared let you curl yourself against his chest.

“Everything’s gonna be fine,” he soothed and you nodded, giving in and falling asleep.


	9. Chapter 9

Nerves got to you by ten am and you were shaking when the clock hit one-thirty. Jared walked you to the cafe, reassuring you that they were only across the street and you’d nodded, walking into the cafe and finding a seat in the middle, open to all sides.

Misha wasn’t busy - Thursdays were normally quiet - and he spent a few minutes chatting with you. He ran the cafe with his wife and their two children who were absent today. “School trip,” he explained when you asked. “Vicky is chaperoning and Maison is probably causing trouble.”

You smiled and thanked him for the hot chocolate, just as Olivia arrived. She looked nervous as she glanced around before spotting you and heading over. “Misha, could you get another hot chocolate?”

Olivia slipped into her seat and removed her big coat, smiling at you. “You remembered I don’t like coffee,” she commented, looking puzzled.

“I’ve got a good memory for things like that,” you reminded her, trying not to let your hands shake visibly.

“Thank you for meeting me,” Olivia said quietly as Misha returned with another hot chocolate, gently touching your shoulder before walking away. The touch was meant as a sign of reassurance and you took it, clutching your mug tightly. “I know, before you left, things were said -”

“You had every right to be mad. We all thought Andrew was…” His name clogged your throat and you tried to swallow down the bile you could taste. “We trusted him,” you whispered.

“You did the right thing,” Olivia confessed, holding her mug of chocolate in much the same fashion as you did. “Andrew was a bully. I knew it and I let him get away with it. I was more angry at myself for not seeing what he was doing. For not being a better detective.”

“He was very clever,” you told her, wondering why you were trying to bolster the woman’s feelings when she told you she’d see you dead when you’d last met. “He had everyone fooled.” You were avoiding saying his name now. “Please, it’s over with now. There’s no point dwelling on it.”

Olivia nodded thoughtfully. “That’s what my church has taught me,” she said slowly, sitting up a little straighter. “I left San Diego not long after you did. I met some wonderful travelling Christians and they’ve really helped me heal. It’s why I was here. We had a function nearby and I saw you, with those two men. You were coming out of the apartment above their store.”

You nodded. Had she seen you while she was putting that photo through your door? “Jensen and Jared,” you explained carefully, unsure how she’d react to you having two new Alphas, let alone one. “They own the store.”

“And the apartment?” Olivia asked and you nodded. “They must be nice landlords.”

“They are,” you replied, leaving it at that. The conversation turned to other, less important things. Olivia gave you updates on your mother, not that you were particularly fussed, and you asked after her family. Before you knew it, two hours had passed and it was getting dark outside.

Misha wandered over, smiling gently. “I’m closing up, ladies. Chocolate to go?”

Olivia laughed, shaking her head as she stood to grab her coat. “No, thank you. I think I’ve over hot chocolated myself today.” She looked at you smiling pleasantly. “Thank you, Y/N. I really do feel like I can put everything to rest now. But I need to go and pack to meet my group.”

Your doubts from earlier about her intentions had been lifted and you smiled back, pulling her into an embrace. “Thank you, Olivia. I didn’t know how much I needed that.” You pulled back, holding her shoulders. “Good luck with your travels.”

“And good luck with your book,” she replied, still smiling. With a wave at Misha, she pulled away and headed out the door. Misha was stood behind you, grinning.

“Went better than you thought, huh?” he asked and you nodded, smiling widely.

“Yeah. I… I didn’t know what to expect,” you admitted. “But Jared was right. Closure.” You sighed, looking at Misha and grabbing your coat. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Mish.”

*****

Returning to the shop, you found Jensen pulling his coat on and Jared already in the truck. Your face fell as you saw them; you’d needed to grab a few things from your apartment. It was a slow process of admission but all three of you knew you wouldn’t spend another night in the place.

“Hey,” Jensen said, grabbing his keys. “We’re gonna head out to the Walmart on 86 and grab a few things.”

“I needed to get some stuff from my apartment,” you replied, snatching your duffel bag off of the chair by the counter. Jensen smiled, kissing you on the cheek as he started to pass. “Are you okay to run back here and grab me?”

His hand was on your ass and he growled playfully. “I’ll grab you anytime,” he quipped with a squeeze and you giggled.

“No, seriously,” you murmured, not resisting when he kissed you properly. Jared beeped the horn outside. “Go, he’s gonna get impatient.”

“He’ll just think we’re fucking,” Jensen replied, still grinding against you. “Be back in an hour?” You laughed and nodded, practically pushing him out the door. Turning away from him, you let yourself into the apartment. “An hour!” Jensen yelled and you threw him a thumbs up before closing the door.

The truck drove off noisily and you grabbed your mail off the floor, jogging up the stairs into the living room. You dumped your duffel bag and your coat in the bedroom and went for the kitchen, wondering if you had any of that nice tea you’d bought at the last farmer’s market left.

A floorboard creaked somewhere in the apartment and you turned, frowning. Moving out of the kitchen into the lounge, you looked around, not seeing anything in the low light. Switching the overhead light on, you stood still, searching your surroundings for anything out of place.

The bedroom door swung a little and you looked around for the nearest thing you could use as a weapon. An empty beer bottle was on the coffee table; god knows how long it had been there for. You picked it up and wielded it in front of you, wondering whether you should smash it first.

Someone was in your bedroom.

You crept closer, scenting the air but whoever it was had drowned themselves in a foreign scent. With the unbroken bottle, you tried not to shake as you approached your bedroom.

Something heavy collided with your head and you went down instantly, hitting the floor. For a second, your blurry vision picked up boots and then everything went black.

*****

Jensen clicked his tongue, putting his foot on the gas as they coasted down the road towards the bookstore. “We’re twenty minutes late,” he scolded and Jared gave him a look.

“She’s not gonna kill us,” he grunted back. “We’re nearly there.”

Pulling the truck into the little space by the store, Jensen barked that he’d wait there. Jared rolled his eyes, knowing you wouldn’t care if they were a little late. He slammed the truck door and stalked off, frowning as he drew closer to the back door of the store, right next to your front door.

It was wide open.

His heart felt like it was going to tear itself in two as he broke into a run, taking the stairs two at a time. “Y/N!” Jared’s voice was high-pitched and breaking and loud enough that it drew Jensen out of the truck. “Y/N!”

“What the hell is going on?” Jensen demanded as Jared tore through every room, coming up empty. “Where is she?”

“She’s not here,” Jared snapped back, grabbing his phone, coming to a stop in the middle of the lounge. “Hello, 911?” Jensen was staring at something on the floor and Jared frowned, following his eyes down to the carpet. One single smudge of blood, almost dry. The 911 operator answered and Jared stuttered uselessly.

Jensen grabbed the phone and took over as Jared dropped to his knees. Overwhelming agony ripped through him as he felt his throat clog up with unbearable sobs. His fingers stretched out, tracing the blood, smelling you everywhere.

He didn’t know how much time had passed when Jensen hauled him off of the floor. The police arrived and Jared sat on the back of the truck, staring and catatonic. When Jensen finally snapped, slapping him to try and rouse him, Jared burst into tears.

“I promised her,” he choked out and Jensen frowned, placing his hands on the other Alpha’s shoulders. Jared raised already puffy eyes to meet his gaze. “I promised her nothing would happen. That she’d be safe.”

“We’re going to find her,” Jensen promised without missing a beat. “We’re gonna find her, Jared.” He pulled the younger man into an embrace, holding him tightly and hoping he wasn’t about to break his promise too.

*****

Your lip hurt. You’d woken to find them cracked and dry; when you attempted to wet them with your tongue, it stung and you tasted blood. Everything around you was black - whoever had taken you had put a cloth bag over your head that smelled like feet and left you breathing through your mouth to avoid smelling it.

There was a sound in the apartment and someone had hit you from behind, you remembered. Wherever you were, your kidnappers had neglected to put your coat on and it was freezing. Much colder than it had been earlier. Rope bound your arms to the chair you were sat on and the knots were tight, almost cutting off circulation.

Someone moved in front of you and you couldn’t control your panic. “Who’s there?” you called out.

The cloth bag was ripped away and you squinted in the sudden light. Everything drifted into focus - the concrete room, the howling wind outside and…

Your dead husband stood in front of you, smiling and holding the little bear you’d found in your duffel bag what felt like months ago.

“Hey, sweetheart,” Andrew crooned, tossing the bear away. “It’s so good to see you.”


	10. Chapter 10

It couldn’t be real. You’d seen his body, identified him in the morgue. The gunshot had been fatal, directly to the heart.

“I know, right?” Andrew grinned, spreading his arms wide. “It’s a miracle.” He shook his body like he was rejoicing and terror curled in your chest like a parasite. This man was different than the man you’d spent nearly six years of your life with. He looked positively maniacal. He was bigger than you remembered and he’d grown a thick beard in place of his clean shaven look.

“I saw your body,” you whispered, unable to process what was happening. “I  _buried_  you!”

Andrew tutted, shaking his head as he walked around you. “No, you buried an empty casket. And the body?” He shrugged. “Nothing a little make up and paying off a corrupt coroner can’t fix.” Another wide smile crossed his face. “And you were so sweet when you identified me.”

Your face screwed up in disgust at his words, unable to believe he was so twisted. “I mourned you, you asshole!”

He raised his eyebrows, drawing back as if he were offended. “Sweetheart, you dragged my name through the mud. Couldn’t leave well alone and die like a proper Omega. Broken hearted. I really thought you were genuine at the funeral but it was all crocodile tears, huh, baby?”

“It wasn’t,” you snarled, fighting with your bindings. “I loved you!”

Andrew laughed, stepping back and leaning against the wall as you struggled uselessly. “You’re not gonna get out of there. You never did have much in the way of upper body strength. Just the rolls on you.” He grimaced and you went still, staring at him in horror as he continued. “I mean, I’m not against banging fat chicks but there’s a line, y’know. I guess it takes two of them to haul you into bed, is that what the deal is?” Your head slowly shook from side to side and Andrew took it as an answer rather than disbelief. “Then how do you nail two Alphas, honey? Cos,” he paused, laughing, “no offense but you are a terrible lay.”

Tears trickled down your cheeks now as Andrew moved away, belly-laughing his glee at your misery.

“One of ‘em get drunk and knock you up? Are you bribing them?” His guesses just made you cry harder and you wanted to scream at him and tell him that Jensen and Jared wanted you because you were theirs, because they loved you - but the voice in your head was feeding you the doubt all along, your mind working against you.

“Shut up,” you managed, miserably.

“Shut up,” Andrew mocked. “I never wanted to marry you. I didn’t want to be stuck with one fucking Omega, especially not one like you. But my parents -” He hissed, shaking his head. “They were insistent. Kept pestering for grandkids. I wasn’t about to give them that but marrying you got them off my back.”

“Why are you saying this?” you asked.

“Because,” Andrew snarled, suddenly at eye level, right in your face and you thought you peed a little in fright, “I was stuck for years with you at home, a mewling little Omega who just wanted to be loved.”

You shook your head, fighting anew. “You didn’t have to marry me. You didn’t have to be nice to me.”

“I was nice to you because if you believed I loved you and then I died,” he stood up, pacing away like he was talking to a moron, “you’d die from a broken heart like a proper Omega when they lose their Alpha.” He spat at the ground by your feet. “I didn’t count on the fact that you were always fucking miserable anyway so there wasn’t much change for you.”

Rage was filling your veins now and you tried to move the chair. The result was a cuff round the head from Andrew’s meaty fist and your vision span.

“Stop trying to fucking escape. Your precious Alphas aren’t going to find you up here.” Andrew stomped across the room, dragging a bag into sight, pulling a sharp looking knife from inside and your heart thudded in your chest, eyes wide with fright. “You’re not going anywhere. You should have kept your mouth shut and not plastered my face all over the fucking news.” He leaned in with the knife and grinned wickedly, pressing the tip at the edge of Jensen’s mark.

“Andrew,” you gasped, “please -”

He pressed the knife in harder and pain like lava flashed across your throat. “Keep begging,” he snarled. “No one’s listening.”

*****

Jensen had quickly pointed the finger at Olivia and the police had been quick to track her down. Jared insisted that they speak to her, following the police in their truck to accost her at her motel. She was packing, like she’d told you she was doing and she looked genuinely shocked to have police knocking on the door.

By now, you’d been missing for an hour.

She pulled out her police badge, handing it over so they could check it. “What’s this about?” she asked, spotting Jensen and Jared across the parking lot. They were approaching and they looked large and intimidating. “You’re Y/N’s Alphas,” Olivia murmured. “What are you doing here?”

“She told you?” Jensen asked and Olivia nodded.

“I was just leaving town to meet my church group,” she explained, wringing her hands together. “What’s going on?”

“Y/N was kidnapped,” Jared growled, clenching his fists at his sides. “Last week she got a photo of her and her husband in the mail. And now, after coffee with you, she’s missing.”

Olivia looked shocked to her core, clutching her chest. “And you think - I’m a cop!”

“So was your brother,” Jensen provided and Olivia glanced at him in surprise.

“Ma’am, if you’ll come with us,” one of the officers said but Olivia held up her hands.

“Wait! I can prove it. I was at the diner, across the street. After I had coffee with Y/N, I went to get something to eat. They had cameras and I have receipts.” She looked at each Alpha in turn. “I didn’t do this.”

The officer nodded, motioning to his colleague. “We’ll check the tapes in the diner. Ma’am, I’m gonna have to ask you to sit in the car while we check.” Olivia nodded, allowing them to guide her to the patrol car and lock her in the back. The two officers headed for the diner and Jensen and Jared swiftly followed.

The diner owner was happy for them to see the camera footage from between four pm and five thirty pm, the window they were using to narrow down what had happened. Neither officer asked the Alphas to leave, allowing them to hover as they reviewed the footage.

Jensen squinted as something passed by the window where Olivia was sitting. She’d been there for the whole time and it was nearing the seventeen-twenty timestamp when the face moved past. “Go back,” he barked and the officer looked at him, before shrugging and complying.

When it reached the part where the face appeared, Jensen reached out and pressed the pause button, capturing the frame perfectly.

“What are we looking at?” one of the cops asked, frowning at the screen. Jensen pointed at the face and Jared growled low in his throat, making both cops jump. “Who is that?”

Jensen sighed, terrified of what it meant. “That’s Andrew. Y/N’s husband.” He looked at Jared. “Her dead husband.”

*****

You’d been alone for ages. You couldn’t feel your extremities anymore, which was somewhat of a relief after what Andrew had done to you. Sticky tear tracks were slowly freezing on your cheeks and your skin was tight and itchy where he’d cut you.

“It’s only superficial damage,” he’d explained, ignoring your pained cries as he dragged the knife through your skin. “Deep enough to bleed, deep enough to scar, not deep enough to kill.” Andrew’s laughter would ring in your ears forever, at least, that’s what it felt like. This twisted, evil visage of a man you’d foolishly believed loved you.

He was insane.

Your throat and arms were coated with dried blood but you couldn’t feel the sting of the wounds now. You couldn’t feel anything except overwhelming despair and the cold that made your whole body shake violently and your teeth chatter together.

He’d been specific with the cuts he’d made. Lines were carved through the marks on your throat, completely obliterating them both. On your arms, Andrew had reopened the scar on your right arm and on the left, he’d dug the words “omega bitch”. The arms of the chair you were tied to were tacky with dried blood and tears.

When he was done, he’d left you. You had no idea where he’d gone or what he was doing.

Did he intend for you to die there?

The air felt thin as you struggled to fill your lungs, growing more exhausted by the minute. At a guess, Andrew had brought you to the mountains, ten miles north of Spell. It was always snowing on the high peaks and there was vehicular access for about six miles into the snowy wilderness.

There was no chance of rescue anytime soon unless Andrew told them where you were.

Heavy footsteps crunched through the snow and panic took hold of your chest. No matter how hard you tried to control it, the red mist around your vision was getting worse and you struggled against your ropes, finding energy still in your aching muscles, crying out for help.

It was not a savior. No one was coming.

Andrew leered at you from the doorway to the concrete bunker - probably one of the hunting bunkers dotted around the mountains. He was swathed in proper winter clothing, his red face peeking out from under the parka hood. “You look a little chilly,” he commented, making no move to cover you. Your clothes were ripped where they’d been in his way and you loathed to admit, you’d soiled yourself long before he’d returned.

“Please,” you rasped, “Andrew, let me go. I won’t tell anyone -”

“Pfft,” he dismissed, reaching for his bag again. He pulled out a roll of duct tape and approached you, smiling at your frantic expression and your fruitless tugging at your bindings. “They all say that.”

“Why don’t you just kill me!” you shrieked, trying to get away but it was pointless - the tape stretched over your mouth, reducing your cries to muffled noises that the wind easily overwhelmed.

Andrew stood back, satisfied with his work. “I don’t think you quite get how this works, slut. In about six hours, I’m going to be on a flight to Cuba with twelve million dollars and you…” He tilted his head to the side, an affectionate smile on his face, an echo of the man you’d thought he was and not the insane psychopath he evidently relished being. “You’re going to freeze to death in here. I mean, it’ll take ages and it’s gonna hurt.” He thought about it for a moment and shrugged, turning away. “Maybe you’ll be lucky and wild animals won’t chew on your carcass too much before your Alphas find you.”

You screamed into the tape but he was already walking towards the door, picking up the bag and waving at you as he left.

Outside the bunker, the snow started to fall again, the wind howling and drowning out any sound you could possibly make.


	11. Chapter 11

Cops were out in force, searching the town and knocking door to door with a photograph of Andrew. Jensen and Jared had joined the search after they released Olivia. She’d instantly offered her services, despite her shock that her brother was alive.

“I don’t understand,” she kept whispering. “I saw his body.”

You’d been missing for nearly two hours and both Alphas were exhausted, unable to do anything more. They returned to their store under the instruction of the cops, Olivia tagging along, hovering like she could possibly help.

“Maybe you should just go,” Jared muttered, dropping himself into one of the chairs in the bookstore’s backroom. Jensen had found a bottle of whiskey behind one of the box files and was currently pouring three glasses. “There’s no point you missing your church group when we can’t do anything.”

“I know my brother,” Olivia insisted, giving Jensen a small smile when he offered her a glass of whiskey. She took it, shaking her head as she looked into the glass. “He wasn’t like this.”

“Clearly you don’t know him as well as you think,” Jared sneered and Jensen kicked his chair, scowling. “I’m sorry,” Jared mumbled, taking his drink from the other Alpha. “I’m stressed. Anything could have happened to her and I -”

“We’ll find her,” Jensen growled and the room fell silence.

A knock at the door made all three of them turn and Jensen got up from where he’d been leaning against a shelf, putting his drink down and heading for the front of the store. Jared and Olivia followed, lingering by the counter as Jensen opened the door to a tall, dark haired man with a very square jaw.

“David?” Olivia stepped forward and David frowned as he saw her.

“The cop from San Diego?” Jared questioned and David nodded, stepping into the shop. Jensen shut the door, staring at the man in concern.

“I’ve been calling Y/N all day,” David started, not noticing the tense atmosphere or your absence. “I had a call that told me Andrew faked his death and it might have been him sending the photos.” His statement was met with silence and he frowned, wondering why none of them were reacting.

Olivia sighed, rubbing a hand over her face. “We know. He’s taken Y/N.”

David blinked, horror making his face go slack. “What?”

“She was taken from her apartment,” Jensen mumbled, walking back towards Jared. “Andrew’s got her, he’s had her for hours and no one can find them.”

“Is that why you’re here?” David asked Olivia, moving closer to her, his approach intimidating. “You and Andrew were always thick as thieves so don’t tell me you’re here innocently.” He was almost within reach of her when Jensen slid himself between them, utilizing his height advantage over the other male.

“Her story checks out,” Jensen informed him. “It’s just coincidence.”

Jared turned away, wandering into the back office and David stared at his retreating back. “So you’re sitting here doing nothing?” he asked, his gaze returning to Olivia. “You’re a cop. Why aren’t you working on this? You know him. You know his habits, his patterns -”

“Yeah, from when he hadn’t faked his death!” Olivia spat, folding her arms over her chest.

“Have you checked cameras?” David demanded and Jensen looked at him blankly. “Store cameras, traffic cameras. Do you have security on this place?”

Jensen nodded, his entire expression morphing as he realized what they’d missed. “There’s cameras on the back of the building.”

David glared at Olivia. “Check all the angles. You know this, Liv!”

“I’ve… I’ve been out of the game,” she stuttered, shaking her head. “I haven’t…”

“The cameras are in the back,” Jensen announced, turning on his heel and chasing after Jared, almost barreling the taller Alpha out of his way in his haste to reach the computer. He turned it on, finding the files for the surveillance cameras. “The best one we have,” he muttered, scrolling through as Olivia and David entered the back room, crowding the small space, “is this one.” Jensen touched the screen, where there was a dark scene of the space where they parked their truck.

All four fell silent as Jensen checked each file. The truck pulled out from the drive with Jensen and Jared inside at 16:04 and you disappeared off the camera towards your door. Moments passed and Jensen sped it up, spotting something move at the bottom. None of the other angles showed a clearer picture but at 16:15, something moved again and Andrew’s face was barely visible.

“It’s him,” David breathed.

Andrew moved further into the camera frame, obviously struggling with something. He moved off to the side - it was obviously you he was dragging but it wasn’t clear enough on the tape.

Nothing happened for a few seconds and then truck headlights filled the screen, a large old Chevy trundling out into view with Andrew in the driver’s seat and no sign of you. “Get the plates,” David ordered quickly and Jensen froze the screen, showing just enough of the plate for him to scribble it down.

“Run the plates through traffic cameras,” Olivia muttered, eyes going wide.

David nodded, eyeing her closely before taking the slip of paper from Jensen. “We can track the car. Let’s just hope he doesn’t switch out vehicles.”

*****

Everything was cold. You had closed your eyes ages ago, succumbing to the frozen air around you. Your breathing was shallow and body no longer trembling - you didn’t have the energy. Hungry and thirst just mingled with the pain and you knew no one was coming.

*****

“The truck pulled off of route 30 onto the mountain road,” David said, running towards his car. Jared and Jensen scramble for their truck, Olivia accompanying them. “There’s no cameras up that way but only one passable road. If he went that way, there’s nowhere to go.”

Jared didn’t want to think about the implications of that. If Andrew intended to kill you, he couldn’t think of a better place to leave a body than the mountains. “It’s still snowing up there and it’s an hours drive,” Jensen growled at him.

“Then put your foot down,” Jared snapped, not even bothering with his seat belt.

David took off first, with the Alphas and Olivia close behind in the truck. As they got closer to the mountain, the colder it got and Jared glanced out the window as the landscape around them grew snowier and snowier. “It’s at least twenty below out here,” Jensen murmured. “She didn’t have a coat or anything.”

“She’s gonna be fine,” Jared whispered, more to himself than anyone else.

David’s car refused to go any further when the snow was about a foot deep. He jumped into the truck, cursing his sedan. Eventually, the snow was too deep for even Jensen’s beloved beast and all four vacated the vehicle. “I don’t see anything!” Olivia shouted, stumbling in the thick white flakes.

Jensen stood by the driver’s door, staring out into the trees. It was windier up there than in the town but at least the snow had stopped falling.

“It’s been nearly three hours.” Jared’s voice was quiet and only just audible over the wind. Jensen looked at him, worry creasing his forehead. “If she’s alive -”

“She is,” Jensen interrupted firmly, reaching out to touch Jared’s shoulder.

“Look,” David said suddenly, pulling out his gun. “We should split up. The road continues further up but there’s a side track down that way. The snow’s covered any tracks so we gotta be smart.” He glanced at Olivia, casting his eyes over her. “You armed?”

She nodded and David’s mouth set in a thin line.

“Okay. I know these mountains are popular with hunting tourism, right?” the cop asked and Jared nodded.

“There’s a few bunkers. Most of them are close to the main roads,” Jensen offered. “We hike up here in the summer. If I’m right, there’s three in this immediate area but things look different in the snow.”

Olivia raised a hand. “If we’re both armed, maybe one of us should go up the road and the other to these bunkers? How far apart are they?”

Jensen shrugged. “A mile or so. They’re simple shelters, no running water or anything like that. Some of them have lights.”

David pointed at Jared. “You’re with me. We’ll take the bunkers. Jensen, Liv, you go up the road and see if you can see any sign of them.” No one argued, following David’s lead and he set off with Jared towards the tree line. Jensen locked the truck, giving Olivia a solemn grin.

“Shall we?”

With a nod, Olivia fell into step behind him, both of them keeping to the road wherever they could, still having to wade through ankle-deep snow. For the first half-a-mile, neither of them spoke, continuing up the mountain in silence.

“You really love her, huh?” Olivia asked, suddenly and Jensen nodded, looking ahead with a wistful smile. “I mean, not many guys would traipse through snow to rescue someone who could already be dead.” Her tone was a little off and Jensen glanced over at the treeline behind them - Jared and David had already disappeared long before.

“Yeah, I do,” Jensen barked back, picking up the pace.

Olivia shrugged, forcing her long legs through the deepening snow. “I mean, Y/N was always a little… odd. I was surprised she didn’t give up after Andrew was gone.”

Jensen sighed, shaking his head. “Y/N’s strong. She’s a fighter. We’re gonna find her.”

“Maybe,” Olivia replied, her tone even more chilling than the air turning Jensen’s ears red. “Or, y’know -”

The click of a loaded pistol made Jensen stop dead and he slowly turned, coming face to barrel with Olivia’s gun. She smiled at him, none of the fragile woman she’d been before apparent in her stance.

“They might not find any of you.”


	12. Chapter 12

Jared wasn’t taking to David’s company. The older cop was surly and barked orders, taking the lead like he had a monopoly on caring about your safety. And Jared knew half of it was his own bitterness and anguish at losing his Omega; David was just bearing the brunt of it.

“How did you know he was alive?” Jared demanded as they pushed through the trees, avoiding ditches and roots in the snow. It wasn’t so thick undercover but still thick enough that moving through it was hard.

David glanced back at the man he didn’t know a thing about. He knew you’d mentioned them and he knew Jared was an Alpha but he didn’t know what they were to you. “I was contacted by a source who supplied me with photographs taken after Andrew died. He owed money to three different criminal bosses from gambling debts and he was in deep. The only way out was to be dead.”

“So why would he come after Y/N?” Jared asked and David shrugged.

“Revenge?” the cop offered. “All I know is my friend was in danger and I needed to get here. When she didn’t answer her phone this morning… I panicked and took the first flight out.”

Something moved in the trees and both men froze, looking around. “I don’t know where we are,” Jared muttered, eyes scanning the surrounding wood. A deer darted out of a bush, jumping away through the deep drifts and David sighed in relief.

“We best hope there’s no one up here hunting,” he grunted, continuing on through the trees.

A gunshot filled the mountainside, shocking birds out of their nests and the rush of noise had Jared crouching down as David aimed his gun at nothing. “Who the hell was that?” the Alpha snarled, grabbing on to the nearest tree to pull himself out of the snow. “Do you think -”

“It came from up the mountain. Olivia. I knew she couldn’t be fucking trusted!”

Jared stared at him in horror. “And you sent Jensen up the mountain with her, why?”

David leveled him with a glare. “I figured he could handle himself.” He turned, heading back the way they came. “Let’s hope it wasn’t her,” he added and Jared lunged after him, stopping dead when something caught his eye. He straightened and David paused, watching the Alpha closely.

Scenting the air, Jared’s eyes focused on a spot beyond the trees. A tiny glimmer, barely visible through the branches but combined with the sweet smell on the air -

“It’s her,” he whispered, taking off instantly, moving over the snow in long strides that left David struggling to keep up. The bunker was a good 500 meters away but Jared wasn’t wasting time getting to you. Dim light illuminated the tiny windows of the concrete hut and he slipped, landing on his ass when he found the entrance.

Your lips were blue. Blood that was almost black with the cold had stained your clothes and skin and from his spot on the floor, Jared couldn’t tell if you were breathing or now. Bits of frost clung to your eyelashes and his heart leaped into his throat as he crawled towards you.

“Y/N,” he gasped, reaching out to touch your frozen hand.

You were breathing. Barely but the soft wisp of cool air from between your lips gave Jared hope enough for him to scrabble for the ropes. His grip was forceful enough to splinter the chair as he tore you free. With nothing to hold you up, you slumped into his arms, unresponsive to any stimulus.

“Y/N,” Jared repeated, holding your face in one huge hand, terror making his heart constrict painfully when you didn’t so much as moan.

There was no time to waste. He had to get you back to town before the hypothermia killed you. It was a miracle you were still breathing.

Scooping you into his arms, Jared turned, heading for the open doorway to the concrete bunker, making it only a meter before he realized David was standing outside with his hands up, focused on a figure in the snow. Andrew.

“I gotta say,” Andrew grinned, turning the aim of his gun onto Jared. “I was not expecting you to get here that quickly.”

David narrowed his eyes, looking over at you, limp in Jared’s arms. “Is she alive?”

“Er, rude?” Andrew spat, firing a warning shot to the wall by David’s head. The cop flinched and Jared’s grip on you tightened. “Don’t you have a hello for your old partner, Dave?”

“My partner died. You’re a fucking psycho,” David ground out, returning his eyes to Andrew. The other man laughed loudly, clutching his belly as he exaggerated the reaction. “What was this? Revenge?”

Your former Alpha bowed his head. “Call it opportunity,” he drawled. “I was expecting her to drop dead in San Diego - she was always so depressed, anyone could have called it.” He smiled, looking at Jared with a dangerous glint in his eye. “I fixed her up for you. If she lives, you can call it a fun party story.”

“I’m gonna kill you,” Jared snarled.

“Good luck with that,” Andrew retorted, taking aim at David. The cop moved, propelling himself forward and the bullet connected with his shoulder, passing right through. David hit the ground, clutching his arm and screaming in pain as blood splattered the snow around him. “Goddamn, my hands are cold!” Andrew laughed, walking over to where David was struggling to get up. “Stay still for this one.”

He took aim again and David closed his eyes, knowing he had no way out.

“That’s enough!”

Olivia’s voice rang out through the trees and Jared looked towards her, searching desperately for any sign of Jensen. Had she killed him? Hurt him? Was he out there somewhere bleeding to death?

If he lost you and lost Jensen… Jared wouldn’t have anything left.

“Liv,” David cried out and Andrew kicked him in the face, knocking him out cold. Olivia peered at him in distaste then glared at her brother.

“What the fuck are you playing at?” she growled, stomping through the snow towards them. She held a pistol in her hand and Jared swallowed, worrying more about Jensen with every passing minute. “You were supposed to kill her in the fucking apartment.”

Andrew rolled his eyes, turning to his sister like he was a stroppy teenager. “You never let me have any fun.”

Olivia scowled, picking up David’s gun from the inside of his jacket. Jared stared at her in disgust. “So it was you.”

“No,” Olivia growled back, “I didn’t touch her. I just provided the distraction while he waited for her.” She cocked her pistol, aiming at your head. “Stupid bitch didn’t have a clue.”

“Wait, please,” Jared begged. “What did you do to Jensen?” She didn’t answer, still aiming her gun at you. “Olivia -”

“He’s alive. At the moment. Can’t guarantee he will be later. You definitely won’t be.” Taking a breath, she sighed, shaking her head. “I can’t believe you. Honestly. I trusted you to get the key and kill her. We could have been on the fucking plane by now.” Her attention, and the gun, turned to Andrew who was looking puzzled. “Although Y/N did make me realize one thing.”

Andrew looked nervous, frowning as she stepped closer with the gun trained on him. “Liv, what are you doing? We’re a team remember?”

“Oh, I remember,” Olivia growled. “I remember the orders, the bullying, the scorn. I remember when you told me that it would just be us. But she’s always going to be there! She’s a freak. Can’t even die when she’s supposed to.” Confusion crossed his face and Olivia laughed, just as fucking insane as her brother. “You know what I realized on the way up here, Andrew?”

He raised an eyebrow and she grinned.

“Twelve million doesn’t sound like a lot to share.”

The gun went off and hit Andrew square in the throat, taking him down. The exposed jugular spurted blood like a fountain and Jared stared in horror, wanting to throw up. Olivia gently blew over the barrel of her gun, smirking happily.

A shadow moved in the trees behind her and Jared spotted it, trying not to react. It moved closer and Olivia aimed the gun at Jared. “Well, she’s practically dead,” she shrugged, “and your boyfriend is probably just about expired, too. Anyone ever tell you that you got a really weird relationship going on there?”

Jared could see the figure now, limping through the snow, a trail of crimson behind him. It was Jensen, leaning heavily on one leg and holding the gun that he kept in the bookstore, a small Colt he’d always had for protection. Jared had always insisted they’d never need it in Spell but now…

He couldn’t be more grateful.

“I will think of you,” Olivia continued, “when I’m sipping margaritas in Cuba.”

“You drink mojitos in Cuba, bitch,” Jensen yelled, barely giving Olivia time to react before he pulled the trigger. The shot hit her side and she screamed out, hitting the floor with a thud. Her gun fell from her grip, sinking into the snow. Limping over, Jensen dropped his weight on top of her as she tried to dig for her weapon. “Concealed carry,” he snarled, bringing the butt of the gun down on her temple, knocking her out cold. “You don’t mess with Texans.”

Jensen looked up, meeting Jared’s eyes and the younger man couldn’t decide if he wanted to collapse or puke. You were a dead weight in his arms; Jensen, satisfied that Olivia was down, dragged himself over.

“The police are on their way,” he groaned and Jared sank down, shifting your weight so it was shared between the two of them. “I didn’t realize you could get such great reception up here. GPS is shit though.”

“I love you, you fucking idiot,” Jared laughed, almost crying.

Jensen grinned. “Yeah, love you too, man.”


	13. Chapter 13

The clock ticked over to four and Jensen looked up, sighing heavily. He closed his laptop and tucked it into his bag, grabbing his keys to lock up. He’d only had one customer all day and clock watching was getting old.

It was a bright April evening and spring was starting early. All the flower beds that lined the street were brimming with new life and Jensen couldn’t but grin when a bumble bee crossed his path, heading for a fresh daffodil.

“Morning, Jensen,” Mrs. Milton from the charity store greeted as he passed and Jensen smiled back, continuing on down the street. Misha’s was open and when Jensen stepped inside, his friend waved.

“Hey, Jen,” Misha chirped, handing West a spoon for his ice cream. “Got a hot chocolate and a fresh croissant ready for you. Put a little something in there for Jared too.”

“Thanks, Mish,” Jensen replied, leaning on the counter and wincing. “Man, I wish this would stop aching.”

Misha peered at his leg. “Still having trouble with that, huh?” Jensen nodded, scooping up the boxed pastries and slipping them into his bag. His fingers closed around the hot chocolate and Misha sighed. “I’m sorry, man. I still can’t believe that happened here.”

Jensen shrugged, pushing himself off of the counter, hot chocolate in hand. “It’ll heal,” he said slowly, looking down at his thigh. The bullet had lodged in the bone and the doctor said he’d probably always have weakness in his leg. He was lucky to be alive. “I’d better get goin’, or I’m gonna be late.”

“Give our love to Y/N,” Misha called as the bigger man headed for the door. “And tell Jared he can’t skip class this week!”

Calling back an affirmative response, Jensen lumbered down the street back to the store, placing the hot chocolate in the cup holder of the truck before climbing in. His phone dinged and he pulled it from his pocket. Smiling at the impatient text, he started the truck and pulled away from the parking spot.

Spell didn’t have a hospital - the nearest one was twenty miles away, at least thirty minutes by car if you drove sensibly. Jensen tried but he was always just a little bit over the limit in his need to get where he was going.

The hospital staff knew him by name and greeted him warmly when he entered, heading right for the same floor and same room he did every day. Jared was half-asleep when Jensen opened the door, jolting him awake.

“Hey,” Jensen murmured, sliding into the armchair on the opposite side of the bed, placing the hot chocolate on the bedside table. “How are you feeling?”

Jared yawned and stretched, sitting up straight. “I’m good,” he replied. “I’m not the one who got shot.” He leaned over the bed, smiling as you slept soundly. “She woke up for a bit earlier,” Jared said quietly. “Asked where you were.”

“I’m sorry I wasn’t here,” Jensen mumbled sadly, sliding his hand over yours. “Did she eat?”

“Yes, she ate,” you groaned, cracking one eye open. “I am right here.”

“We thought you were sleeping,” Jared scolded and you grinned at him, opening both your eyes. “Don’t eavesdrop.”

“I weren’t droppin’ no eaves, sir,” you joked, shifting in the bed and wincing in pain. “Can I sit up, please? I’m sick of that ceiling.” Jensen chuckled and got to his feet, leaning over to help you sit up as Jared adjusted the bed. Once you were sat comfortably, you sighed and smiled, looking at them both.

God, they looked exhausted. Days of trying to juggle work, home and keeping you company while you recovered in hospital was taking its toll and you felt worse by the day.

“Hey,” you started, frowning at the thought, “you know you guys don’t have to be here all the time, right?” The two Alphas looked at each other like you’d asked them something in a different language. “I mean, I’m doing okay, most of the wounds have healed and hey,” you swiped the remote from the table beside you, waving it at them, “they give us television and everything.”

“We want to be here,” Jared insisted, fixing his eyes on yours. “You’re our priority.”

It had been the same for nearly thirty-two days. At first, Jensen was forced to stay - the bullet that had almost shattered his leg took seven hours to remove in surgery. Jared had been a wreck, spending his time between Jensen’s doctor and yours. You’d barely been alive when they finally made it to the emergency department.

Jared could still hear them working on you; he had nightmares about it. The flat line on the monitor and someone calling for a defibrillator. The size of the needles they’d injected into you and all the warming bags to try and raise your temperature slowly enough so your blood pressure didn’t drop.

It was four days before you opened your eyes. You couldn’t talk with the tube in your throat and the conscious moment was brief. The doctors had warned him and Jensen to be cautious in their optimism - until they could perform further tests, there was no telling what sort of damage the hypothermia had done.

Nine days after you’d been brought in, they took the tube out and you could breathe on your own. You remembered your name, what year it was, and who was president, and Jared had almost cried.

Olivia was being treated in the same hospital on the restricted wing. Jensen had managed to pop a bullet into her gallbladder, which had probably hurt like hell, although Jared didn’t think it was enough. Andrew was dead, for real this time, and David was recuperating back in San Diego, keeping in touch with you via text and phone calls.

Once your former sister-in-law had recovered, she’d be arraigned on charges of kidnapping, attempted murder, extortion, assault, assault on a police officer and perverting the course of justice. It was likely to be a long sentence. Detectives had uncovered enough evidence to guarantee a guilty verdict - Andrew was not the only cop in his family that was corrupt.

David had called you when they’d uncovered the storage locker where your former husband had hidden the proceeds of his crime. Twelve million dollars, accumulated over god-knows how long. Andrew had been expecting you to die, unable to survive without an Alpha, and the key to the storage locker was sewed into the back of the bear you didn’t remember owning.

Tomorrow, you would have been in the hospital for thirty-three days and you were sick of it.

“I don’t want to monopolize all your time,” you complained. “What I want is to be home, in bed, watching crap on Netflix. I miss Margo. I miss Boba.” You fixed them with a plaintive gaze, sticking out your bottom lip for effect. “I miss my Alphas.” Both men were looking at you now and you sagged your shoulders. “This bed isn’t big enough to accommodate either of you gargantuans.”

“We know,” Jared soothed, taking your hand, smiling at your comment. “And we want you home, too.”

“But you need to recover,” Jensen finished, taking your other hand. A knock on the door made all three of you look up as Doctor Nurdin walked in, smiling brightly.

“Y/N,” he greeted, grabbing your chart from the end of the bed. He was a fairly young doctor but he’d been fantastic - you owed your literal life to him. “How are you feeling today?”

“Good,” you replied, smiling. “When can I go home?”

Dr. Nurdin chuckled. “Same answer as yesterday, Y/N. When I’m satisfied that your wounds are healing and you’re clear of any necrosis.”

Jared cringed. “I hate that word.”

“I think dead flesh sounds worse,” you mused, smiling at him and Jared smiled back, bending to kiss your hand. “So I can’t go home today,” you lamented for a second, before brightening up. “Tomorrow?”

“You’d think she was sick of me,” the doctor murmured good naturedly. “Day by day, Y/N.” He looked over your chart, signing something. “Jonah will be along for your physical therapy in a few moments. I will have to ask your gentlemen to leave, as always.”

You groaned as your two Alphas stood up, hating physical therapy. “Can they come back later?” you asked, hopefully raising your eyebrows. Dr. Nurdin gave you a look and you slumped down, sulking as Jared leaned over to kiss your forehead.

“I’ll be back first thing. Text me after therapy.” He smiled at you and you smiled back, forgoing your sulk while they said goodbye. Jensen swept his arms around you, kissing the spot below your ear. He didn’t say anything but he never needed to.

And then they were gone. Dr. Nurdin remained in the room, observing you fidgeting on the pillows. “I assume you haven’t told them yet?”

You shook your head, looking down at your hands. “No. I… I haven’t figured it out.”

“How are your sessions with Miranda going?” he asked and you shrugged.

“Okay, I guess.” With a sigh, you met his eyes, seeing his concern. “It’s hard to think about moving on from this but at the same time… I really wanna go home.”

“I can’t let you go until I’m certain you are stable enough to do so,” Dr. Nurdin explained, moving to sit on the side of your bed. “You were lucky to survive, Y/N. You were strong enough to literally come back from the dead. Now, I’m not a religious man, but I would call it a miracle.”

You smiled, wishing you felt that way. They might have warmed you up but you felt numb on the inside, frightened of closing your eyes in case Andrew came back. “Thank you, doctor.” Jonah, your physical therapist, knocked on the door, walking into the room. “Hi, Jonah,” you greeted.

“I’ll let you get going with the therapy. I’m not in for the rest of the week - Dr. Carroll will be your lead physician.”

“Is she a soft touch?” you asked.

“No, she is not,” Dr. Nurdin replied, laughing under his breath.

*****

The only thing worse than the physical therapy was the psychotherapist. Rachel was a sweet and gentle lady but it didn’t stop you fearing the cozy office with the warm peach couch. She had pictures of kittens on the walls and cuddly toys everywhere.

They were letting you go home in two days. You’d been in hospital for thirty-four days in total and you missed everything that wasn’t clinical and single-serving. But you could only leave if you told Jared and Jensen the truth.

Which was why they were sitting in Rachel’s cozy office looking over-sized against her furniture and decor. Jensen sat on the edge of the couch one side of you, mimicking Jared’s position with his knees spread, almost touching across your legs with their ridiculously long limbs.

“You know,” Rachel commented, after introductions were made, “the way your sitting appears very casual to the untrained mind.” Jared’s eyebrows met the hem of his beanie and Jensen frowned. Rachel chuckled, shaking her head. “You appear to be sitting casually but both of you are alert. You’re almost touching, shielding Y/N from danger but indicating that you desire to be close to one another.”

Jensen sat up and Jared cleared his throat. You giggled, nudging his arm. “I told you she was good.”

“I’ve never met two Alphas that co-existed as Y/N tells me you do. It’s rare to find someone with the pack gene, let alone three people in one place.” Rachel fixed her eyes on you. “The change in you is amazing. Just having them in your presence has calmed you significantly.”

Jared’s hand found yours, threading through your fingers and you smiled, glancing back at him.

“So why are we here today?” Jensen asked. You swallowed, the tension in your chest returning.

Rachel smiled widely. “We’re here because the condition of her discharge is that she is honest with you both.” The air rushed out of your lungs as you felt the weight of both Alpha’s gazes on you. “It’s not something we would normally require but her health literally depends on it and she agreed to… moral support when she told you.”

Jared was sitting straight now, looking at you in concern. “What is it?” he asked. “What’s the matter?”

“It’s okay, Y/N,” Rachel crooned and you tried to school your breathing, feeling like the air was thinner, like you were back in the cabin. A warm hand covered yours and you met Jared’s eyes. “You’re safe here.”

“I’m pregnant,” you whispered.

There was confusion on his face at first and Jensen squeaked, making you turn to look at him. “Huh?”

“I stopped taking birth control when I left San Diego and I never got the prescription filled. I - I meant to do it that week but it would have already been too late.” The words were rushing out in a flood now, fear of their rejection making you wanna hurl your breakfast all over the floor. “And we haven’t talked about it.”

“But the hypothermia -” Jared stuttered, still holding your hand. “You - you died, Y/N.”

You nodded, smiling through tears that were brimming in your eyes. “They don’t know how I’m alive. Let alone -” Breaking off because saying the “b” word was terrifying, you gestured at your stomach and Jared’s eyes dropped. “She’s small but she’s there. I’m only about seven weeks.”

Rachel was smiling when you met her eyes and you knew you had continue. Taking a breath, you focused yourself, trying to calm your racing heart.

“I was scared to tell you because… because I’m frightened you’ll not want us.” Jensen stared at you in disbelief as Jared shook his head in denial, tightening his hold on your fingers. “And I know it’s irrational but this…” You touched your throat, the thick sweater hiding the worst of the scars Andrew had left behind. “This makes me feel like I’m not good enough for you.”

Jensen was touching you now, leaning in to wrap his arms around your waist and burying his face in the crook of your neck. He’d always been more action than words and this was his way of denying your statement. You were sobbing now, blinking more tears away as Jared cupped your cheek.

“We’re not going anywhere,” he assured you softly, leaning in to kiss you. Rachel cleared her throat and he stopped at just a chaste peck.

Your therapist smiled softly at you, Jensen remaining pressed against you. Stroking your fingers through his hair, you encouraged him to pull away. Someone knocked at the office door and Rachel looked up. “Come in.” Dr. Nurdin appeared, smiling. “Dr. Nurdin. I’m clearing Y/N for discharge.”

“That’s excellent news,” he exclaimed, his smile growing.

Jared was still holding your hand, staring at you in amazement. “I love you,” he whispered, lifting your hand to kiss it. You sighed happily, leaning your head against his shoulder. “You don’t ever have to be scared to tell us anything,” Jared added, locking eyes with Jensen as the older Alpha nodded.

“There’s a reason I’m in therapy,” you muttered and he chuckled.


	14. Chapter 14

It felt good to finally breathe fresh air that didn’t have a touch of ammonia to it. You rolled the windows down, enjoying the spring breeze in the back of the truck, Jensen’s soft acoustic rock album making you feel like you were in some kind of music video.

Wouldn’t that be easier?

For a little while, when you returned home, you were ecstatic. Margo and Boba were happy to see you and Jensen cooked what you would later describe as the best meal of your life. He’d bought jello for dessert because he thought he was hilarious, but you didn’t care because you were  _home_.

Settling down to watch Game Of Thrones was slightly surreal, almost like you hadn’t nearly died.

Then you’d feel the raised bumps on your arms, the scar tissue that would never go away and you’d sober.

It was a good thing you were used to the nightmares. Sometimes they were frighteningly violent and bloody; those were the ones where you woke with Jared holding your arms as Jensen spooned you from behind, surrounding you in their scent and safety.

Other times, you’d wake, silently crying and too ashamed to wake either of the Alphas. On some occasions, Jensen wouldn’t be able to sleep and you’d join him, playing video games until you were simply too exhausted to stay awake.

Laying there at night, staring at the ceiling was almost worse than the nightmares. Tonight, your mind was replaying Andrew’s laugh over and over, the sting of the knife on your cold skin. You felt your scars itch and a shudder ran through you.

Jared’s hand moved, covering yours where they rested on your belly. “You okay?” he asked.

“Shouldn’t you be asleep?” Jensen commented and you couldn’t help but smile.

“What time is it?” Jared groaned and you sighed.

“Two am.” You flinched when Jensen turned the light on, propping himself up on his elbows.

“I gotta ask,” he started, “when did my bedroom become everyone’s bedroom?”

You frowned, rolling your head to look at him. “Wait, were you two sharing a bed while I wasn’t here?” Silence was your answer and you stifled a giggle. “Oh my god. Who was the little spoon?”

“There was no spooning,” Jensen defended. “It was… manly sharing a bed.”

“Keep compensating, sweetie,” Jared teased, laying his head on your chest. You giggled happily, stroking your finger through his thick hair. “God, I missed you being home,” he murmured, kissing your belly. “Jensen kicks in his sleep.”

Jensen gasped in horror. “I do not,” he retorted indignantly, his voice higher and posher than usual. Jared was nodding and you were about to pee yourself laughing. “In all seriousness though,” Jensen dropped his voice back to normal, nuzzling his nose against your shoulder, “it is really good to have you home.”

You hummed when he kissed your shoulder, slowly making his way up over your collarbone. When he reached where his mark had been, where the criss-cross scars obliterated it, you froze a little. It wasn’t the first time Jensen had touched them but this felt a little more sexual than harmless comfort in a hospital.

Warmth curled in your belly, stretching down to make your toes curl and you turned your face to Jensen. He searched your eyes for a moment before leaning in, pressing his lips softly to yours and when you responded, he moaned.

Jared was lifting your shirt up now, kissing along your belly and the back of your mind itched with the need to pull your shirt down, all your insecurities raging back to torture you. He seemed to sense your discomfort, pulling covers up a little so he was hidden from view.

Jensen’s hand was on your breast now, kneading the fleshy mound as he explored your mouth with his tongue. You had one hand around the back of his neck, the other still stroking through Jared’s silky locks, whining when he moved out of reach, his fingers hooking into the side of your panties and dragging them down your thighs.

“Can I take this off?” Jensen asked, tugging at your shirt and you hesitated, unsure if you were ready for them to see the ugliness of what had been done to you. “You don’t have to, but I wanna tell you,” he kissed you softly again, “the scars aren’t you.”

You nodded, a single tear escaping and Jensen kissed it away, abandoning your top and sliding his hand up underneath instead to cup your breasts. His thumb dragged over your nipple and you arched, whimpering as Jared’s hot breath cascaded over your pussy.

An impatient twist in your stomach made you cry out when Jared’s tongue pressed against your clit, caressing the swollen bud as he pushed two fingers against your entrance. You were already wet, twitching around him as he started to fuck his fingers into you slowly.

“Jen,” you whispered, reaching your hand down, covering the tent in his boxers. Jensen groaned, thrusting into your hand without thinking and you grinned, sliding your hand underneath the waistband to wrap your fingers around his thick shaft.

His boxers were gone the next second, flung across the room to wherever their dirty laundry ended up. You took full advantage, squeezing and stroking him in time with Jared’s fingers inside you.

It wasn’t enough. You wriggled against Jared’s hand, gasping, desperate for release but your body wasn’t complying. Jared slid a third finger in and crooked them, mouthing noisily at your clit. A desperate cry had your hips jerking and Jensen groaned as you started to whisper the words “fuck me” over and over.

Jared snarled, tearing himself away and crawling up your body. He caught your lips in a kiss, sheathing his cock inside you with one brutal thrust that made you scream and buck underneath him, finally reaching that moment of ecstasy with the stretch of his thick Alpha cock inside you to the root.

Jensen came, coating your fingers and his stomach with his cum, groaning as you locked eyes with him, Jared’s face buried in your throat.

It took all of two minutes for Jared to lose control, hips pounding away until his knot thickened and forced you into another climax, his cum warming your belly. His teeth sank into your throat, higher than what was normally accepted for a mark and in a more painful spot, but you didn’t care.

You just wanted it back.

The bed bounced a little as Jensen climbed off, retrieving his boxer shorts and tossing you a towel for your hand. Jared was still covering you, his boxers tucked underneath his asscheeks and his face pressed against your neck. When his entire body started to shudder with heavy sobs, you pulled the covers up, coaxing him onto his side as he withdrew from your body.

Jensen was gone when you looked up.

With a sigh, you curled into Jared, peppering him with kisses until he would meet your eyes. His were puffy and red already and you wiped away the stickiness on his cheeks. “You okay?” you asked.

He laughed, shaking his head. “I’m fine. Nothing happened to me.”

“Plenty happened to you,” you whispered. “And if this is a safe space for me, then it is for you, too.”

Jared closed his eyes, pressing his forehead against yours. “I almost lost you.” The whispered admission was about as much as you’d expected and you closed your eyes, too. “I almost lost Jensen. And I was terrified of being alone and now you’re here and… I’m more frightened of that than ever. You’re my family. My pack. I don’t want to face a life without that.”

“And you won’t have to,” you insisted, frowning at him as you opened your eyes and pulled back to see his face. “This is not you talking, Jare. It’s the things in your head telling you lies, just like mine told me that you wouldn’t want me. That you wouldn’t want the baby.” You smiled, stroking his fresh tears away with your thumbs. “Have you been going to therapy?”

“Yeah,” Jared muttered, still looking miserable. “Dr. Pattinson said the same thing.”

“See?” you whispered. “I love you.”

A smile lit up Jared’s face as he met your eyes. “That’s the first time you’ve said that,” he pointed out, cupping your cheek with his huge hand.

“Well, I do. I love both of you.” Your mind went to Jensen and you turned your head to look at the door. Jared inhaled deeply, tugging you back towards him.

“He’ll come back to bed when he’s ready,” Jared soothed, closing his eyes again. “Get some sleep.”

You found it a little easier to rest with Jared wrapped around you and you woke the next morning with Jensen pressed against your back, one arm slung around your waist. Jared had moved, covering you and Jensen with one of his long limbs, his hand curled possessively around Jensen’s elbow.

Deciding that you were fine where you were, you closed your eyes and went back to sleep.


	15. Chapter 15

Another night, another nightmare.

You shuffled out of bed, abandoning Jared and hobbling to the kitchen, finding Jensen where he always was during his bouts of insomnia. Sometimes you felt bad that you were always happy to find him up on the nights when sleep wasn’t coming for you.

“Hey,” you whispered, grabbing a bottle of water and dropping yourself onto the couch. “Whatcha playing?”

Jensen frowned up at the screen. “I picked it up when we were in town this morning,” he said, glancing over. “Gears Of War. Guy said I could take some frustration out on it but mostly I’m just being crap.” He died again, dropping the controller with a scowl. “It’s 2am, baby, shouldn’t you be sleeping?”

“I had another nightmare,” you confessed, sipping at your water.

“Same one?” he asked, recalling your first night home from hospital. Tonight would be your fifth night home and Jensen had been unable to sleep every single one of them.

“Different dreams every night.” You leaned back on the cushions. “Could we play Mario Kart or something?” Jensen arched an eyebrow at you.

“It’s an Xbox,” he drawled. “Mario Kart is Nintendo.” He stood up, approaching the shelves by the television. “We could play mini-golf?” You nodded, swinging your legs up so you could sit with them crossed. Taking another mouthful of water, you placed the bottle down.

The important conversation you had yet to have was put to one side as Jensen beat you at mini-golf repeatedly, cheering with each win. You didn’t mind - video games were not your forte - and Jensen seemed to be enjoying himself.

Eventually, you were too tired to focus and Jensen put a movie on, finding something pointless on cable for background noise. “Jared seemed better today,” you commented, looking up at the ceiling fan as Jensen stroked his fingers through your hair.

“I think he needed last night,” Jensen murmured, smiling softly. The light from the television played across his face, highlighting the angles of his jaw and the shadow of stubble on his skin. For a guy pushing forty, he was still very pretty.

“And you?”

He shrugged. “Jared needed you more. He’s always been more… outwardly emotional and I think he’s feeling guilty we both got hurt.”

“I’m the one to blame,” you said firmly but quietly and Jensen glared at you, his hand going still on the crown of your head. “He came here for me and that stupid key.”

“You didn’t know the key was in that stuffed bear,” Jensen replied matter-of-factly. “You didn’t know his sister was a nutcase. You didn’t even know he had a storage locker. You didn’t know any of that was gonna happen - you thought he was dead!” You sat up, resting on your hands as you looked into Jensen’s face. “Me and Jared… we should have gotten to you faster, not spent so much time in the store, driven faster -”

“Shoulda, woulda, coulda,” you shrugged. “It’s done. We’re moving on.”

Jensen laughed but there was no humor in the sound. “Are we? I can’t sleep, you’re having nightmares and Jared is on the edge of falling apart. Or he was. He’s…” He tilted his head to the side, looking at you curiously. “He’s been better today.”

“He’s moving on,” you repeated, laying back down. “You need me just as much as Jared does. We all need each other.”

“Is this one of those emotional pep talks?” Jensen asked, resuming his slow stroke through your hair. “Because I’m not so great…”

“It’s not a pep talk,” you chided, rolling your eyes. “It’s an ‘I’m here’ talk. If you need anything -” Your words were cut off as Jensen shifted, pulling you into a kiss that made your lungs burn and your thighs quiver. He had one hand tangled in your hair, the other around your waist, molding you against his bigger body like you belonged there.

“You,” he murmured, brushing his lips against yours, “I just need you.”

You nodded, returning the kiss, pulling his shirt over his head. Taking a breath, you steadied yourself, straddling his lap, before gripping the hem of your shirt. Jensen covered your hands, shaking his head and frowning.

“Don’t feel like you have to,” he whispered and you smiled.

“It’s okay. I need to get used to it. Just a little damaged, right?” Your smile wavered and Jensen released your hands, letting you take control of your movement. The shirt came up, over your head and you sucked in another deep breath, closing your eyes before tossing the top away. For a few seconds, you didn’t open your eyes, too scared to see disgust on Jensen’s face.

“Don’t say you’re damaged,” he said quietly, touching your chin with his fingertips before stroking down along your jaw. You kept your eyes on his when you opened them, seeing nothing but love and lust in Jensen’s gaze. His fingers glided over the thick scars on your throat, moving further down to the ones on your arms. Plastic surgery and the assistance of skin grafts had covered the worst of the damage on your arms and the writing, but the ones on your throat were too thickly clustered for a safe procedure.

“I love you,” you whispered and Jensen smiled, pulling you in to kiss you.

“I love you too,” he replied, sliding his hands up your bare back to your shoulders. Words were forgotten as Jensen kept kissing you, allowing breaks for oxygen but nothing more. He laid you down carefully, kissing his way down your body, tugging your panties over your hips and flinging them away.

He stopped at your navel, pressing his nose into your unseen bump. “And you,” he whispered, barely audible but you caught it, smiling.

Jensen moved again, kissing you as he fumbled with his sweat pants, tossing them onto the coffee table. He pressed himself between your thighs, covering your body but keeping his weight off of you. “Touch me,” you murmured, one hand on his face, the pad of your thumb gliding over his stubble. “Please, Jen -”

It was all the encouragement he needed - Jensen kissed you again, taking his time in tasting your lips, using his knees to spread your thighs. “I got you,” he muttered, rubbing the tip of his nose on yours. Two fingers pressed into your soaked slit, easily opening you up. Your whimpers of pleasure were muffled by his mouth covering yours and Jensen groaned when your body tightened around his fingers. “Need you,” he growled.

You nodded, pulling him against you when he withdrew his hand, eager to feel him. His bright eyes connected with yours as he pushed into you, the pleasure forcing you to break away when he was buried completely. Jensen’s head dropped, his forehead against your chest, his breath tickling the skin between your breasts.

“Don’t ever wanna go that long without you again,” he breathed, lifting his head and sweeping you into a kiss before you could open your eyes and focus on him.

He started to move, urgent, hard thrusts that had you crying out against his plump lips, teeth almost clashing when you kissed. His hands wouldn’t stay still - it was like Jensen needed to map you out, rediscover you all over again.

Lifting up, he shifted so you were almost on his lap, his legs bent underneath your ass. A determined look crossed his face, followed by a lewd smirk. “Gonna make you cum, ‘mega.” You cried out, Jensen’s thumb stroking your clit as he resumed his thrusts.

Sweat was breaking out on your skin and the position the Alpha held you in rendered you immobile, entirely at his mercy. Jensen was snarling, lost in his instinct, his fingers bruising your hips with the force of his grip.

You came, head thrown back and neck arched, crying out loud enough for the dogs to vacate the room.

Jensen’s knot thickened, filling you as he came, his arms flexing as he dragged you up, burying his mouth in the curve of your throat. His teeth drew blood, only a few millimeters from where his mark had been before.

Slumping in his hold, you burst into tears, overwhelmed and relieved to be back with them. Jensen didn’t move and didn’t speak; he just held you, letting you work it through.

Jared found you the next morning, curled naked on the couch with Jensen behind you, thick arms wrapped around you protectively. He smiled, draping a throw over you both. The other Alpha stirred, lifting his head to fix hazy green eyes on Jared.

“Hey,” Jared murmured softly, touching Jensen’s shoulder. “You good?”

A sleepy smile crossed the older man’s face and he laid his head back down, letting his eyes close again. “We’re good.”

*****

“Merry Christmas,” you whispered, rolling over to poke Jensen. He stirred, opening one eye when he heard the baby monitor going off. Jared moved, sitting up automatically.

“I’m on it,” he slurred, lumbering from the room. You sat up, stretching as Jensen buried his head under the pillows.

“Jen,” you whined, “it’s Christmas.”

He groaned loudly, lifting the pillows to glare at you. “You had a baby a week ago. Shouldn’t you be sleeping?”

You shrugged. “Too excited.” Reaching out, you snatched the pillows, forcing him to vacate as you attacked him.

“Alright, alright, I’m up!” he growled, scowling at you as you sat cross-legged in the middle of the huge bed, Christmas pyjamas and all. “You’re mean. It’s a damn good thing I love ya.” A bright smile lit up your face and Jensen leaned in, kissing you softly.

Jared appeared in the doorway, baby JJ looking tiny in his huge hands. He had her cradled against his bare chest and your heart practically melted at the sight. “I think someone’s hungry,” he yawned and you slipped from the bed.

“I’ll get it,” you whispered, dropping a kiss onto your daughter’s forehead before disappearing into the kitchen.

“Did you finish wrapping it?” Jensen hissed, watching Jared lumber over to the bed, slowly easing himself down with the tiny baby girl on his chest. He raised tired eyes to his best friend and nodded. “Awesome.”

Forced bed rest during pregnancy had left you with plenty of time to finish your novel. You’d sent it to the editor and it was submitted for publishing. Jensen and Jared had both read it, finally getting why you’d been so secretive about the contents.

The whole point of therapy was to defeat your demons and you’d done so; by writing them down into tangible characters, yourself as the heroine. The plot had changed over the course of the last year with the inclusion of new characters but you felt it made the story a little more… involved. Your heroine wasn’t alone anymore and neither were you.

JJ had come along earlier than expected, only by a few weeks, but enough to throw everything off kilter. The book had been published but you’d put it on the backburner while dealing with giving birth. You dread to think what your inbox looked like and didn’t dare open your laptop until you’d managed more than forty-five minutes sleep.

Once the baby had been fed and you were all relatively awake, you decided it was time to get Christmas underway. Misha and his family were coming for Christmas lunch and you were impatient to give the boys their gifts. Plowing through the more fun things took a while and when there were only two presents left, an envelope and a box, Jared took JJ from you, nodding at Jensen.

Jensen retrieved the box, frowning at the envelope. “This one is for all of us.”

“I think David sent it. It’s got a San Diego postmark and says ‘don’t open until Christmas’,” you took it from him, “which is super annoying when you get it three weeks before.”

“Open this one first,” Jensen insisted and you looked at him, a funny expression on your face as you took the box, discarding the envelope. Jensen looked like a kid on an excessive sugar high as you tore open the box.

Inside was a frame, with a newspaper clipping inside from the New York Times. You frowned, reading it and gasping when you realized what it was. The New York Times book review, giving your book 4.5 out of 5 stars.

“We know you haven’t opened your emails and you’d been avoiding the stress,” Jensen said softly. “But you did it. And we’re really proud of you.” You looked to Jared, who was smiling widely.

“This is amazing,” you whispered, leaning in to kiss Jensen first and then Jared, trying not to cry. The envelope was still by your knee and you carefully placed the frame in the box before sweeping it from the ground. “I need to know what this is.”

Jensen laughed, watching you tear it open. A piece of paper fell out when you pulled the letter free and Jensen picked it up, staring at it. His face went slack but you didn’t notice, too busy reading the letter.

“Dearest Y/N,” you started aloud, “I am hoping this will bring you good tidings on Christmas morning and that you are not too tired. Welcome to parenthood.” JJ gurgled and you smiled, looking over at her, still not seeing Jensen’s expression. “I didn’t want to phone you with the news, knowing you’re in hospital right now. But enclosed is a check for -” You stopped dead, not sure if you were reading right.

“Two million dollars,” Jensen whispered and you glanced at him, finally seeing the shock on his handsome features. He showed you the check and your eyes widened with each zero.

Jared stole the letter, reading the rest of it. “Due to your emotional and physical trauma, the amount enclosed is damages due from the San Diego Police Department and Andrew Whittaker’s personal accounts. As his next of kin, the money goes directly to you.” He sat back, lowering the letter. “Holy shit,” he murmured, meeting your eyes.

“Wait,” Jensen said, “does this mean I can get that foosball table?”

You couldn’t help it - you started giggling. “This can’t be real.”

“Seems real,” Jared said, shrugging and reaching for the check. “Yeah, this is real. What the hell do we do with two million dollars?”

“Foosball table,” Jensen repeated, giving you both a look like you were idiots.

“Medical bills,” you whispered, sobering. “We won’t have to worry about debt. You could open another store.”

“College for JJ,” Jared smiled, getting on board. “More babies,” he added, lowering his voice and you felt your cheeks heat up.

Jensen slid across the floor, pressing in close behind you and leaning on your shoulder with a sigh. “Give it away for all I care,” he murmured, sliding his arms around your waist. Jared moved closer from his side, releasing JJ to your hold when you reached for her. “I’ve got everything I need right here.”


End file.
